First, let me say that my housesitters are wonderful, responsible young women. They are lovingly caring for my two cats and my houseplants while I am taking my little diversionary work-related hiatus from reality.

But they didn't expect the Spanish Inquisition!


I mean, they didn't expect raccoons!




It seems that my housesitters were leaving the cat-egress window open all night, partly for the cats' convenience, and partly because the apartment is damn hot in the summer. One of them woke up the other night to the sound of a raccoon eating my cats' food. Housesitter had to go down one set of stairs, try to shoo the raccoon out the window, and when that didn't work, had to go down the second set of stairs to open the main door for the little rapscallion to saunter through. To get into my window, that raccoon had to first find a way from the ground to the roof over the second floor, THEN discover the tasty kibble-bits in the cats' bowl. Crafty little motherbleeper. And damn lucky; that's expensive kibble I serve.

The housesitters were wondering how the cats could eat so much food, yet not gain weight. Ladies and gentlemen, we have our answer! El Diablo Mapache!!!

The landlady brought screens. All is now well, and mapache-free, at Number Four, Port-au-Patios.

Whew!