Rachel, to your question, I would ask: does Memorial Day paint the US as victim? Why would there be a difference?

But I'm not even talking about a national day of mourning or anything like that. I'm talking about our historical desire as Americans to throw the past in the trash and "get on with our lives." Immigrants came over, shaved their beards and cut their hair, changed their names, and were new people, presto change-o. When things got rough they packed up their families -- or abandoned their families -- and moved west. Presto change-o. We're still doing it. 3,000 people died down the street on this day three years ago? Hell, that was then. Come have a beer, flip a burger, forget it.

I don't believe you can forget it. You don't have to let it rule your life, just like you don't have to let your father's lousy parenting rule your life, but you'll be in trouble if you pretend to yourself you're "over it" without ever asking yourself what it is you're over. As an individual; and as a society.