I'm way behind on updating here - I have all sorts of fun things from the past week I'd like to write about, like Daniel's amusing birthday dinner, and why writing employee self-evalutations sucks, and stuff. It will probably have to wait a while longer, because I don't really have the time.

But I did want to relate an interesting little workplace incident, because I'm feeling rather proud of myself for having handled it well.

I got into work this morning, and found a note from a coworker, which somewhat flabbergasted me. I really couldn't tell whether he was making a humorous reference to something I'd said to him the other night, or a sarcastic wounded reference to something I'd said to him the other night. (It contained something I'd written to him some time ago, which related to the topic of the remark, with a clearly jesting comment written beneath it. Clearly jesting, but possibly also bitter, and I really couldn't tell.)

I was a bit worried that maybe I'd offended him, wasn't sure how to handle it. Should I ignore it? Make an offhand lighthearted reference to it the next time I saw him? But if he was really offended by what I'd said, that might make it worse...

Okay, I decided. There's nothing for it. I'm going to march straight over to his cubicle and say, "Hey, I got your note, and I'm not quite certain how to read it. I'm worried that I may have inadvertently offended you by something I said the other day, and if I did, I want to apologize."

So, I marched. And, of course, he was on the phone. So, I did the little, 'Hey, can I talk to you when you're done?" wave, and went back to my cube.

And he showed up five minutes later and said, cheerily, "Hey, wasn't that note I left you funny?"

Phew! Pretty clearly no offense. "Yeah, it was funny," I said. Then just in case, I added, "You know, it occurred to me that you might have interpreted what I said the other night as a gripe. It wasn't."

He said, "Oh, yeah, sure," and we chit-chatted a little, and that was that.

And now I don't have to worry about whether my coworker is angry with me.

Maybe not a big deal in the grand scheme of things, but I'm fairly sure that at some point in my life not too terribly long ago, I wouldn't have said anything about it, and I would have spent a lot more time worrying uselessly about having given offense.

The thing that really amuses me is that these kinds of communications gaffes occur astonishingly often even between those of us who make our living by the exercise of our communications skills. Oy.

I guess if communication were easy, there wouldn't be multiple professions dedicated to making it work better.