Someone was telling me the other day that the minute you know other people are reading your journal, the point of having a journal is tainted, because you're immediately playing to the crowd.

This theory is mostly sound. However, it does stumble a bit.

For starters, there are very few things running around in my head that aren't for public consumption, not including the non-sequitors, private jokes, and references that only I would get.

Of course, yeah, there's a few things I don't discuss (or hide with humour so you'll overlook it), but those are the one or two entries marked "Private" that nobody (except Codemaster K, our lovely host) can read. That's the price of pulling things out of your head. As far as I'm concerned, it wouldn't make very much difference if this journal were online or off, digital or paper'n pen. If you take it out of your brain, you've already considered (somewhere in the backwater bayou of your mind) the possibility that someone will steal your private possession and read it. So, there's nothing I'm unwilling to share with *someone*...it's just the question of whether or not they can use it against me. Some people, I know, are bound by their ethics; they're Good People and I have no problems exploiting that weakness for my own gain. That's what they're there for, after all. Others are complete strangers; those lovely folk to whom you can tell *anything* and be safe in your anonymity.

Besides, after all this, if you've decided to keep a journal (public or private, online or off), it's probably safe to consider that you're One Vain Motherfucker. Even if it's just for the purpose of reflecting back on your life after the passage of time, that's still pretty goddamned self-involved.

And that's ok, if you can admit to it. Lord knows it took me a little while to realize how disgustingly massive my ego was...

So what was I saying? Oh yes...no, I'm not "playing" to the crowd; I'm playing to *myself*. Is it tainted? Sure, but not because this thing is public. The people I REALLY wouldn't want reading this aren't reading it. It's tainted because I've made the decision to put my thoughts down.

At least, that's my story and I'm sticking to it.