I'm back and I finally have the time and the energy to come on and post and start slogging through my backlog of e-mails. I have a lot to catch up on so here goes.

Thankfully, the bloody diarrhea mess is now gone. Sometimes it was more blood than diarrhea. Way too much for something to have popped and there's no way I was taking a stool softener when I already had diarrhea. Come to find out, I had E-coli. Ugh. It took a few days, but it did get progressively better and now it's all cleared up. Not the best thing to get right before (and somewhat during) the bar though.

Sunday my Mom and I headed to Madison for the bar exam. She came with me so I wouldn't have to go it alone (and so I could still have access to the hotel room since a room key was not one of the objects allowed with us). It was really hard for me to leave Rob and even more difficult for me to leave Gabriel. I had only been away from Gabriel for a few hours before and I did not want to leave my baby. Eventually, much to my dismay, I had to. My Mom drove us to the hotel, we got settled in to our room, and I spent the night alternating between studying and sending Rob dirty pictures on his cell phone.

Monday was orientation. I got up early and spent the morning studying. I headed to check in at 1pm and was out of there around 1:30pm. I was one of the first people there so I was able to check in, get my photo taken, and get my id badge fairly quickly. I loved the id badge photo, it's a shame we weren't allowed to keep them. So much better than my scary "500 pound albino" driver's license picture! Orientation was at 4pm and so I headed back to the room once I had checked in and studied and then headed back to orientation at 4pm. They went over the basics at orientation and people asked a lot of stupid questions. Once orientation was done (around 5pm) I headed back to the room and studied until a little after midnight.

Tuesday I got up at 6am and was down at the testing room a little before 8am. There were some serious air conditioning problems that day and I sweltered and ended up sweating onto my test a lot. Eep. The test was four essays in the morning from 8:30am until 11:30am. They tested on Corporations, Contracts, Professional Responsibility, and Civil Procedure. Not good. I hate (and am not good at) both Corps and Contracts. PR is generally all right, except they tested on Wisconsin specific statutes that my bar review class didn't cover. Civ Pro was also a very difficult question. I came out of the morning session somewhat worried and I hope they would have at least one question on a subject I liked and am good at during the afternoon portion. I was not so lucky. The afternoon portion was also four essays in a three hour time period. 1pm to 4pm. Those essays were Property, Torts, Agency, and Wills. I'm horrible at property and got the worst grade ever in any class I have ever taken in my life in property when I was in law school. The Torts question was confusing. Agency? What the hell is Agency??? My bar review never covered Agency. Uh-oh. And Wills was the Wills question from hell. We had property and a will and had to say how the property would go under probate. Not too bad. Then we needed to deal with a difficult question regarding specific devises which was hard. Then we had to do it all again as though the testator had died intestate. Ugh. There was not one single subject on the essays that I had any confidence in. At least when I took the California bar they gave me a good amount of questions that I knew. Here I did a lot of bull shitting and I really did not feel good about the essays at all. There was one bright spot in my day though, I had a visit that night from Rob and Gabriel. It was so good to see them again. I even curled up in bed with a napping Gabriel for awhile. The little dude was so happy to see me and we had a lot of fun. He loved running around the hotel room and kept kissing himself on the closet mirror. It sucked when they left and I cried and watched for their car to enter the freeway from the hotel window.

Wednesday was the MBE (multistate multiple choice... it's the same multiple choice in every state). Unfortunately, because I took the California bar four years ago I was out of the time frame where I could have transferred my scores and had to take it all over again. The test had a morning session of 100 questions from 8:30am to 11:30pm and an afternoon session of 100 questions from 1pm to 4pm. Much like when I took the MBE for California, it sucked. I could usually narrow it down to two answers, and then had to guess from there. I can only hope I guessed correctly. When the bar was over with my Mom and I headed back home. During the car ride home I noticed my right arm was jacked. It was in a lot of pain (then again I did 12 hours of writing in the past 48 hours) and by the time I got home I couldn't even move it. It was great to be home and be with my boys and Sydney jumped right up onto me. Rob greeted me with welcome home signs (including one from Gabriel letting me know that he had hid the TV remote under the sink for three hours) and a cheese platter and a strawberry bouquet. It was amazing. Our landlord Mac was working on screening in our balcony when I got home. As the day wore on I went crazy and was way overtired and sore and couldn't stop laughing. When it came time for bed I literally passed out.

I do not have a good feeling about this bar. I need to pass and if I don't I really don't know if I can go through this hell again. But I don't think I passed. This scares the hell out of me. There wasn't one single essay subject that I had any confidence in. I know there's nothing I can do until I get my results, but I'm super worried about this. I did all I could do and I don't think it was even close to enough. Results come out in September.

Thursday my Mom headed back to her place and I spent most of the day sleeping. I was beyond exhausted (and still feel tired even today) and needed the rest.

Friday I slept in and we got some errands done. Bank, post office, Babies R Us, etc. There was a lot of badness on Friday and I spent pretty much the entire day in tears. This is not something I feel comfortable discussing on my journal.

Today (Saturday) I got some more sleep (I'm still super tired and am slowly trying to catch up on the rest that I desperately need) and we did some more errands. Yet again Svengoolie was pre-empted by the damn Brewers.

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Which 'Hairspray' Character Are You?
Tracy Turnblad When you set your mind to something, you'll achieve it-- no matter who tries to stop you along the way. But you're not totally self-centered-- you know how to get what you want and deserve and how to help others along the way. You're a romantic at heart, which can sometimes make you a bit vulnerable, but you've got a tough skin. You can handle anything that comes your way!
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