for myself, that is. it's been a long time since i've had the pure pleasure of not cooking for everyone else, but for myself. i don't think watching the old and new season of "top chef" helped much either...lol...

last night i stuffed myself silly (my jeans this morning are showing just how much) first i found this amazing deal across the street on inch thick new york strips...and since there were five to the package, i loaded up four of them into two freezer bags for meals next week, and treated myself to the fifth. it was mooing baby!

then a sauteed two potato perogis with onions and garlic (damn, i wished i hadn't forgotten the mushrooms) i threw in some mustard (spicy brown, why of course), a tiny bit of sour cream, and topped the perogis with pepper jack cheese...after lading the whole thing on top of my strip, i garnished with some celantro, red pepper flakes and diced roma tomatoes. oh baby oh!

we'll call it ger-mex fusion

i needed it, really i did. i've been puttering around the apartment for a few days, trying to get used to the fact i was really alone.

it's been over 20 years since i've lived by myself, and the world i lived in then is not the world i live in now. the paranoia begins to creep in, and i'm jumping at strange shadows, hearing things i didn't hear before, and worrying about how easy it would be to break into my place...and i guess the saddest thing is that i could disappear and no one in particular would know for a long time i was even gone.

add to that the worry of z being in a city 2 1/2 hours away, not really knowing the people he's with (me, not him) and well, it's been a rough week.

he'll be back tomorrow (in which case i'll worry all the way until he walks in the door) so i'll get some form of sanity back.

and hey, maybe my bright side is that one day, i might get "the single girl's guide to cooking for one" cookbook out of it. (i had that girl's "semi-homemade" and martha's "everyday cooking" (for everyday people) idea long before they did...lol)