1. You shall be rightly hesitant to learn new graphics and publishing software 4 days before your report is due.

2. You shall realize that 4 hours of sleep a day for prolonged periods of time makes your vision fuzzy and hampers one's ability to detect typos.

3. You shall remain cheerful and smiling through your challenges and relieve your anxieties with a melting glass of Maker's Mark when you get home at 1:45 a.m.