1) Which of the Winter Olympic sports is your favorite to watch?

It USED to be figure skating, but that woman who comments for NBC is such an unpleasant, Schadenfreude princess, that she ruins it—though I still watch. Now I prefer watching curling in the morning. Those two commentators are old school, interesting, and they aren’t afraid to shut up.

2) Do you speak Snowboardese?

Are you kidding? I was born before 1980. These kids crack me up…and that guy who won the race yesterday is a total hunk who seems to be a very, very nice guy. Perhaps this is the winter sport of the future.

3) Define Nordic Combined. Don't look it up. Take a guess if you must.

Skiing and Shooting—a freakish combination that makes me think about Cold War era James Bond flicks. [UPDATE: I know I was wrong.]

4) Curling. Please discuss.

Shuffleboard for polar people. Bocce for frigid folks. It reminds me of that bean bag game that is sweeping America…or at least Chicago.

5) If you could be a Winter Olympics Champion just by wishing for it, which sport would you choose for winning your Gold Medal?

Pairs figure skating…those guys are in the best shape of any winter Olympians…(I’m so pathetic.)