Ondine

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Ondine
She's got everything she needs, She's an artist, she don't look back. She's got everything she needs, She's an artist, she don't look back. She can take the dark out of the nighttime And paint the daytime black. --Bob Dylan

2006-02-22 8:50 AM
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I haven't posted for a long time. Been very busy and there's been stuff sort of needed to coalesce before I could talk about them here. But here's updates:

Joe: Joe's started with a new doctor for the meds. (still seeing dr. mik). Dr. Haraszti is brilliant but way too busy and Joe's recovery had bogged down into this netherworld of moments of brightness surrounded by depression and paralyzing anxiety. So, Dr. Mik, Zachary and I decided he needed a meds doc who is more aggressive and available. Dr. Gerner is as smart and knowledgeable as H, but he does not have as busy a patient load, and so can give more time and concentration to Joe. We've seen him twice. He's made some big changes in the meds and is wonderful. Very attentive. He's told us that we have every right and reason to expect Joe to be well and happy. So keeping fingers crossed with the changes. Joe does seem better already. Brighter, more awake, more in touch with feelings.

Angela: Angela is doing great! I went to visit her last week. We had a lovely few days hanging out in Baltimore. She's gotten very independent and is committed to not let the divorce or Joe's illness keep her from attaining her goals. She's working very hard, and having fun doing it. Her roommates are sweet and funny. It was parents weekend, so met the other families. We took the girls out to dinner at the harbor. I am so relieved she is making friends. It snowed when we were there, beautiful days. We snuggled together in the hotel watching movies and eating ice cream. I sensed how important it was for her that I was there and connecting with other reality. It was also quite obvious that she didn't want me too close, that she wanted to show me that she could handle being there on her own. I am so proud of her.

Fairy tales: I found my first love on line. I have been doing searches for him for years, then found him over christmas. We met and are in love again. He kept all my letters from when I was 14. I am in awe at how life can change so quickly. Don't want to talk more about it now.

Weight: I joined Jenny Craig this week. I couldn't face the scale after David dropped the bomb and I've gained a lot of weight back this year. I love this diet. They prepare everything and baby me. I so need to be babied when it comes to food. I am really proud I got on the scale.

Writing: Is going pretty good! I feel my craft is improving in poetry, love my class, and the teacher. Going tonight. I've started working on the novel again too.

Knocks on wood. Things are good. I still feel totally gun shy. Told Jenn last night I am waiting for the meteor to drop, but trying my best to enjoy the golden moments.

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