Already took my sleeping pill so feeling a bit groggy - whoever said they stop working after a few weeks don't know shit.

I am crushed by the waves of ignorance, prejudice, and desire to kill that comes out of the internet and the news and the world. I know there are loads of us who want to find another way, but I feel my voice has been drowned out by other louder motherfuckers.

So I went to yoga, good, he took one look at me and asked if I was OK. I hadn't thought I looked attention-provokingly knackered, but clearly I do. I told him I was exhausted and had been told to take it very easy but can't not go to yoga and that I'd manage myself, not doing too much. And he led a very gentle class, lots of stillness, only two brief standing poses, all very kind of him.

Then had lunch with pal J, who is just fab, my writing pal, though I'm just blurting here and she's on a big project. She was my boss about 17 years ago, and when the next boss up was interviewing for her job he asked us to have lunch with the candidates and I immediately warmed to her - she was wearing the very cheapest suit I'd ever seen (she later confided, during this interview day, that it cost £7 at Matalan, which is frankly not enough to pay for a suit but she was still ripped off). She just looked like one of my tribe so I argued for her and yay she got the job and we've been good pals ever since (with a few hiccups)


Since then I've been having a first go at this free-form knitting/crochet:



It's gonna be a thing. Maybe a cushion cover, maybe another kind of thing that has not yet revealed itself to me. I'm doing log cabin as I can only cope with so many decisions every ten minutes.

And Grandson returned my teddy, Bruin, who'd been a gift from my parents on my first birthday, on the grounds that he'd be better off here for a bit, he is 60.




The guy's coming to cut all that fucking Leylandii down on Wednesday, which is a bit shockingly soon



This photo's quite old, we've gained a mobility scooter or two since then. It will be ugly for a while, but not long.

I an grateful for the voices of love and calm and decency; for a buzzy lunch; a kindly yoga teacher; a safe drive home; a blog post written against the odds

xxx