Blue Feather
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Questionable Questionnaire
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1. ONE OF YOUR SCARS, HOW DID YOU GET IT?
Chicken pox. I have one on my forehead, and one on the back of each hand, like stigmata.
2. WHAT IS ON THE WALLS IN YOUR ROOM?
A very large mirror, two hand-made leather masks and a LOTR calendar.
3. WHAT DOES YOUR CELL PHONE LOOK LIKE?
Silver flippy with a picture of a banana inside. It’s a bananaphone. Doo be doo be doo! (see left.)
4. WHAT MUSIC DO YOU LIKE TO LISTEN TO?
Depends on my mood. I like all sorts of stuff, from Beethoven to Blondie to Black Eyed Peas.
5. DO YOU KNOW WHAT TIME YOU WERE BORN?
11:08pm
6. WHAT DO YOU WANT MORE THAN ANYTHING RIGHT NOW?
For my husband not to be in pain anymore.
7. WHAT DO YOU MISS?
My college social life and my high school stamina and flexibility.
8. WHAT IS YOUR MOST PRIZED POSSESSION?
My husband. I’m glad I bought him.
9. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SMELL?
It’s a toss-up: fresh-cut grass or cookies baking.
10. DO YOU GET CLAUSTROPHOBIC?
Only in London; the streets are narrower than NYC. I do get agoraphobia in big flat states, though. Seeing that much of the sky freaks me out.
11. DO YOU GET SCARED OF THE DARK?
Only on Hallowe’en.
13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE COLOGNE / PERFUME?
Marc Jacobs, I guess. It’s what I wear lately.
14. WHAT KIND OF HAIR DO YOU LIKE ON THE OPPOSITE SEX?
Enough for me to grab.
15. WHERE CAN YOU SEE YOURSELF BEING PROPOSED TO?
My husband popped the question in a B&B the night before our friends’ wedding. I hadn’t really thought about it up until then.
16. COFFEE OR ENERGY DRINKS?
Coffee – it makes me go BLARHGHAHG! And it’s delicious.
17. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PIZZA TOPPING?
It varies: mushrooms, meatballs, spinach, or eggplant.
18. IF YOU COULD EAT ANYTHING RIGHT NOW, WHAT WOULD IT BE?
Snow peas, veggie chips, and all the other crunchy things I bought last week that I can’t eat now because of my stupid dental implant.
19. WHO IS THE LAST PERSON YOU MADE MAD?
Peat, cos I didn’t keep the DVDs organized on top of the TV.
20. DO YOU SPEAK A DIFFERENT LANGUAGE?
Je parle francais (un petit peu).
21. WHAT WAS THE FIRST GIFT SOMEONE EVER GAVE YOU (OF THE OPPOSITE SEX):
I’m guessing you mean from a boyfriend. Sapphire earrings for my Sweet 16.
22. DO YOU LIKE ANYBODY?
I like lots of people. I’m not a savage.
23. ARE YOU DOUBLE JOINTED?
Yes, I can bend my thumb down to my wrist and notch the first knuckle on my fingers.
24. FAVORITE CLOTHING BRAND?
I’m a Gap Jap, but I also like Ann Taylor Loft.
25. WHAT`S YOUR DREAM CAR?
Dark green Jag.
27. WHAT IS ONE OF YOUR DREAMS?
A threesome with Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert. That was an awesome dream.
29. WHAT IS THE BEST WAY TO TELL SOMEONE HOW MUCH THEY MEAN TO YOU?
Either to just come out and tell them, or do little thoughtful things for them. Like buying them Powerpuff comics every week.
30. SAY A NUMBER FROM ONE TO A HUNDRED:
9
31. BLONDES OR BRUNETTES?
I had a thing for blondes once, but I got over it.
32. WHAT IS THE NUMBER YOU CALL MOST OFTEN?
Peat’s work and/or cell.
33. WHAT ANNOYS YOU MOST?
People who say, “I could care less.” And other grammatical errors.
34. HAVE YOU BEEN OUT OF THE US?
Yes: Switzerland, England, Wales, Scotland, France, Belgium, Holland, Canada, Mexico, Aruba and St. Lucia.
35. YOUR WEAKNESSES?
I don’t stand up for myself enough; I don’t communicate my needs and feelings enough. But I’m better than I used to be.
36. WHERE DO YOU WANT TO LIVE?
Someplace perpetually warm, but urban and liberal.
37. FIRST JOB?
A runner on the NY Mercantile Exchange. What a bunch of savages brokers are.
38. EVER DONE A PRANK CALL?
No, but I’ve called “976-“ numbers (and got busted by my mom).
39. WHAT WERE YOU DOING BEFORE YOU FILLED OUT THIS SURVEY?
Playing with the kittens.
40. IF YOU COULD GET PLASTIC SURGERY WHAT WOULD IT BE?
Got my nose done almost 5 years ago. Man, did that hurt. But it was so worth it.
41. WHY DID YOU FILL OUT THIS SURVEY?
Why not?
42. WHAT DO YOU GET COMPLIMENTED ABOUT MOST?
Looking young, if people consider that a compliment. I don’t, but I know people mean well. Also, my hair, sometimes.
43. WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF ALCOHOL BECAME ILLEGAL?
Bathtub gin, baby!
44. WHAT DO YOU WANT FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY?
I asked for a day at the salon from my folks; I don’t really need anything else. Except money.
45. HOW MANY KIDS DO YOU WANT?
Possibly one, some day.
46. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?
Sort of. My grandmother Norma’s real name was Dora. Of course, that was just an excuse my mom used to name me what she wanted.
47. DO YOU WISH ON STARS?
Sometimes. It’s hard to in the city, though, cos there aren’t any.
48. WHICH FINGER[S] IS YOUR FAVORITE?
My middle finger, motherfucker.
49. WHEN DID YOU LAST CRY?
Two weeks ago.
50. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
Only when I write with a thick pen. Otherwise it’s too thin and loopy.
51. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT?
Bologna, but I only eat turkey bologna now. One sign of getting old, I guess.
52. ANY BAD HABITS?
Nope, I’m practically perfect in every way.
53. WHAT IS YOUR MOST EMBARRASSING CD ON THE SHELF?
The Monkees. (although Peat thinks most of them are embarrassing)
54. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
Depends on who I was. If I was a jerk, probably not, cos the me that I am now is nice.
55. HAVE YOU EVER TOLD A SECRET YOU SWORE NOT TO TELL?
No, but I’ve told secrets that I didn’t swear not to tell.
56. DO LOOKS MATTER?
Totally.
57. HOW DO YOU RELEASE ANGER?
I yell. Not often, but it happens. Sometimes I throw things. I once threw a personal pan pizza through my college dorm kitchen.
58. WHERE IS YOUR SECOND HOME?
My parents’ apartment, I guess. I have keys.
59. DO YOU TRUST OTHERS EASILY?
No. I’m very cynical and skeptical and a New Yorker.
60. WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE TOY AS A CHILD?
My pink stuffed cat, Pudgy, which I still have up on a shelf, even though it’s 25 years old and all ratty and disgusting.
61. WHAT ARE THE FIRST THREE NUMBERS IN YOUR CELL PHONE?
917
62. DO YOU BELONG TO A CULT/GROUP?
Not anymore, but in college I was in a sorority.
63. DO YOU USE SARCASM?
Not me.
64. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN IN A MOSH PIT?
Yes, and someone fell on my knee and I had to have it x-rayed, but I was fine cos I’m tough.
65. WHAT DO YOU LOOK FOR IN A GUY/GIRL?
A strong interest in me.
66. WHAT ARE YOUR NICKNAMES?
I’ve had over 20 nicknames throughout high school and college; no one calls me any of them anymore except my college roommate who still calls me Claudia. I’m not telling you the things Peat calls me.
68. DO YOU UN-TIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?
Nope. But then I have to when I go to put them back on. Poor planning, I know.
69. WHO IS YOUR CRUSH?
Not telling!
70. WHAT`S YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM FLAVOR?
Cherry Garcia or Dulce de Leche.
72. WHAT ARE YOUR FAVORITE COLORS?
Green and purple.
73. HOW MANY WISDOM TEETH DO YOU HAVE?
None, they never came in. Don’t exist. I’m too evolved.
74. WHO/WHAT DO YOU MISS MOST RIGHT NOW?
The baby tooth that was removed because this implant hurts like a motherfucker.
75. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO ANSWER THESE QUESTIONS?
No, this questionnaire is too lengthy and has stupid questions.
76. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
The Police, cos Peat’s playing them in the kitchen while he’s making dinner.
77. LAST THING YOU ATE?
Jell-o, cos I’m toothless.
78. LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
Peat; he called from the park before.
79. THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE IN THE OPPOSITE SEX?
Their face. But that’s the first thing I notice in the same sex, too. It helps in order to tell people apart.
80. FAVORITE THOUGHT PROVOKING SONG??
Imagine by John Lennon
81. FAVORITE THING TO HATE:
Kohlrabi, cos it annoys my step-brother.
82. FAVORITE DRINK?
Pina colada. On a beach. Far away.
83. FAVORITE ZODIAC SIGN:
Leo, cos I like feline animals.
84. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SPORT?
To watch: gymnastics. To play: table tennis.
85. HAIR COLOR?
My hair color is chestnut brown with hints of red (and now, sadly, gray).
86. EYE COLOR?
I’m so full of shit, my eyes are brown. (an old boyfriend used to say that to me)
87. DO YOU WEAR GLASSES?
Only if I’m not being social, or not feeling well. Otherwise I wear contacts.
88. SIBLINGS?
One step-brother, one step-sister-in-law, one step-brother-in-law, and two sisters-in-law.
89. FAVORITE MONTH?
July, my birthday month. And October, because I like autumn and Hallowe’en.
90. YOU LIKE SUSHI?
Hells yeah.
91. LAST THING YOU WATCHED?
My Fair Lady – I even watched the special features that had Audrey Hepburn singing her own songs.
92. FAVORITE DAY OF THE YEAR?
Saturday.
93. ARE YOU TOO SHY TO ASK SOMEONE OUT?
Yes, but not too shy to jump their bones.
94. SUMMER OR WINTER?
Summer. I hate being cold.
95. KISSES OR HUGS?
Depends from who. Some people are lousy kissers but great huggers, and vice-versa. Luckily, my husband is great at both.
96. RELATIONSHIPS OR ONE NIGHT STANDS?
There’s something to be said for both. But not simultaneously. Unless it’s agreed upon beforehand.
97. WHO IS THE MOST LIKELY TO ANSWER THESE QUESTIONS?
No one I know.
98. WHO IS THE LEAST LIKELY TO ANSWER THESE QUESTIONS?
I’m not asking anyone else to answer these questions.
99. WHAT BOOKS ARE YOU READING?
I just finished Friday by Robert Heinlein, and I’m re-reading Alice in Wonderland by Lewis Carroll.
100. IS ANYONE IN LOVE WITH YOU?
My husband had better be, or there’ll be trouble.
Chicken pox. I have one on my forehead, and one on the back of each hand, like stigmata.
2. WHAT IS ON THE WALLS IN YOUR ROOM?
A very large mirror, two hand-made leather masks and a LOTR calendar.
3. WHAT DOES YOUR CELL PHONE LOOK LIKE?
Silver flippy with a picture of a banana inside. It’s a bananaphone. Doo be doo be doo! (see left.)
4. WHAT MUSIC DO YOU LIKE TO LISTEN TO?
Depends on my mood. I like all sorts of stuff, from Beethoven to Blondie to Black Eyed Peas.
5. DO YOU KNOW WHAT TIME YOU WERE BORN?
11:08pm
6. WHAT DO YOU WANT MORE THAN ANYTHING RIGHT NOW?
For my husband not to be in pain anymore.
7. WHAT DO YOU MISS?
My college social life and my high school stamina and flexibility.
8. WHAT IS YOUR MOST PRIZED POSSESSION?
My husband. I’m glad I bought him.
9. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SMELL?
It’s a toss-up: fresh-cut grass or cookies baking.
10. DO YOU GET CLAUSTROPHOBIC?
Only in London; the streets are narrower than NYC. I do get agoraphobia in big flat states, though. Seeing that much of the sky freaks me out.
11. DO YOU GET SCARED OF THE DARK?
Only on Hallowe’en.
13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE COLOGNE / PERFUME?
Marc Jacobs, I guess. It’s what I wear lately.
14. WHAT KIND OF HAIR DO YOU LIKE ON THE OPPOSITE SEX?
Enough for me to grab.
15. WHERE CAN YOU SEE YOURSELF BEING PROPOSED TO?
My husband popped the question in a B&B the night before our friends’ wedding. I hadn’t really thought about it up until then.
16. COFFEE OR ENERGY DRINKS?
Coffee – it makes me go BLARHGHAHG! And it’s delicious.
17. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PIZZA TOPPING?
It varies: mushrooms, meatballs, spinach, or eggplant.
18. IF YOU COULD EAT ANYTHING RIGHT NOW, WHAT WOULD IT BE?
Snow peas, veggie chips, and all the other crunchy things I bought last week that I can’t eat now because of my stupid dental implant.
19. WHO IS THE LAST PERSON YOU MADE MAD?
Peat, cos I didn’t keep the DVDs organized on top of the TV.
20. DO YOU SPEAK A DIFFERENT LANGUAGE?
Je parle francais (un petit peu).
21. WHAT WAS THE FIRST GIFT SOMEONE EVER GAVE YOU (OF THE OPPOSITE SEX):
I’m guessing you mean from a boyfriend. Sapphire earrings for my Sweet 16.
22. DO YOU LIKE ANYBODY?
I like lots of people. I’m not a savage.
23. ARE YOU DOUBLE JOINTED?
Yes, I can bend my thumb down to my wrist and notch the first knuckle on my fingers.
24. FAVORITE CLOTHING BRAND?
I’m a Gap Jap, but I also like Ann Taylor Loft.
25. WHAT`S YOUR DREAM CAR?
Dark green Jag.
27. WHAT IS ONE OF YOUR DREAMS?
A threesome with Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert. That was an awesome dream.
29. WHAT IS THE BEST WAY TO TELL SOMEONE HOW MUCH THEY MEAN TO YOU?
Either to just come out and tell them, or do little thoughtful things for them. Like buying them Powerpuff comics every week.
30. SAY A NUMBER FROM ONE TO A HUNDRED:
9
31. BLONDES OR BRUNETTES?
I had a thing for blondes once, but I got over it.
32. WHAT IS THE NUMBER YOU CALL MOST OFTEN?
Peat’s work and/or cell.
33. WHAT ANNOYS YOU MOST?
People who say, “I could care less.” And other grammatical errors.
34. HAVE YOU BEEN OUT OF THE US?
Yes: Switzerland, England, Wales, Scotland, France, Belgium, Holland, Canada, Mexico, Aruba and St. Lucia.
35. YOUR WEAKNESSES?
I don’t stand up for myself enough; I don’t communicate my needs and feelings enough. But I’m better than I used to be.
36. WHERE DO YOU WANT TO LIVE?
Someplace perpetually warm, but urban and liberal.
37. FIRST JOB?
A runner on the NY Mercantile Exchange. What a bunch of savages brokers are.
38. EVER DONE A PRANK CALL?
No, but I’ve called “976-“ numbers (and got busted by my mom).
39. WHAT WERE YOU DOING BEFORE YOU FILLED OUT THIS SURVEY?
Playing with the kittens.
40. IF YOU COULD GET PLASTIC SURGERY WHAT WOULD IT BE?
Got my nose done almost 5 years ago. Man, did that hurt. But it was so worth it.
41. WHY DID YOU FILL OUT THIS SURVEY?
Why not?
42. WHAT DO YOU GET COMPLIMENTED ABOUT MOST?
Looking young, if people consider that a compliment. I don’t, but I know people mean well. Also, my hair, sometimes.
43. WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF ALCOHOL BECAME ILLEGAL?
Bathtub gin, baby!
44. WHAT DO YOU WANT FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY?
I asked for a day at the salon from my folks; I don’t really need anything else. Except money.
45. HOW MANY KIDS DO YOU WANT?
Possibly one, some day.
46. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?
Sort of. My grandmother Norma’s real name was Dora. Of course, that was just an excuse my mom used to name me what she wanted.
47. DO YOU WISH ON STARS?
Sometimes. It’s hard to in the city, though, cos there aren’t any.
48. WHICH FINGER[S] IS YOUR FAVORITE?
My middle finger, motherfucker.
49. WHEN DID YOU LAST CRY?
Two weeks ago.
50. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
Only when I write with a thick pen. Otherwise it’s too thin and loopy.
51. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT?
Bologna, but I only eat turkey bologna now. One sign of getting old, I guess.
52. ANY BAD HABITS?
Nope, I’m practically perfect in every way.
53. WHAT IS YOUR MOST EMBARRASSING CD ON THE SHELF?
The Monkees. (although Peat thinks most of them are embarrassing)
54. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
Depends on who I was. If I was a jerk, probably not, cos the me that I am now is nice.
55. HAVE YOU EVER TOLD A SECRET YOU SWORE NOT TO TELL?
No, but I’ve told secrets that I didn’t swear not to tell.
56. DO LOOKS MATTER?
Totally.
57. HOW DO YOU RELEASE ANGER?
I yell. Not often, but it happens. Sometimes I throw things. I once threw a personal pan pizza through my college dorm kitchen.
58. WHERE IS YOUR SECOND HOME?
My parents’ apartment, I guess. I have keys.
59. DO YOU TRUST OTHERS EASILY?
No. I’m very cynical and skeptical and a New Yorker.
60. WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE TOY AS A CHILD?
My pink stuffed cat, Pudgy, which I still have up on a shelf, even though it’s 25 years old and all ratty and disgusting.
61. WHAT ARE THE FIRST THREE NUMBERS IN YOUR CELL PHONE?
917
62. DO YOU BELONG TO A CULT/GROUP?
Not anymore, but in college I was in a sorority.
63. DO YOU USE SARCASM?
Not me.
64. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN IN A MOSH PIT?
Yes, and someone fell on my knee and I had to have it x-rayed, but I was fine cos I’m tough.
65. WHAT DO YOU LOOK FOR IN A GUY/GIRL?
A strong interest in me.
66. WHAT ARE YOUR NICKNAMES?
I’ve had over 20 nicknames throughout high school and college; no one calls me any of them anymore except my college roommate who still calls me Claudia. I’m not telling you the things Peat calls me.
68. DO YOU UN-TIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?
Nope. But then I have to when I go to put them back on. Poor planning, I know.
69. WHO IS YOUR CRUSH?
Not telling!
70. WHAT`S YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM FLAVOR?
Cherry Garcia or Dulce de Leche.
72. WHAT ARE YOUR FAVORITE COLORS?
Green and purple.
73. HOW MANY WISDOM TEETH DO YOU HAVE?
None, they never came in. Don’t exist. I’m too evolved.
74. WHO/WHAT DO YOU MISS MOST RIGHT NOW?
The baby tooth that was removed because this implant hurts like a motherfucker.
75. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO ANSWER THESE QUESTIONS?
No, this questionnaire is too lengthy and has stupid questions.
76. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
The Police, cos Peat’s playing them in the kitchen while he’s making dinner.
77. LAST THING YOU ATE?
Jell-o, cos I’m toothless.
78. LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
Peat; he called from the park before.
79. THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE IN THE OPPOSITE SEX?
Their face. But that’s the first thing I notice in the same sex, too. It helps in order to tell people apart.
80. FAVORITE THOUGHT PROVOKING SONG??
Imagine by John Lennon
81. FAVORITE THING TO HATE:
Kohlrabi, cos it annoys my step-brother.
82. FAVORITE DRINK?
Pina colada. On a beach. Far away.
83. FAVORITE ZODIAC SIGN:
Leo, cos I like feline animals.
84. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SPORT?
To watch: gymnastics. To play: table tennis.
85. HAIR COLOR?
My hair color is chestnut brown with hints of red (and now, sadly, gray).
86. EYE COLOR?
I’m so full of shit, my eyes are brown. (an old boyfriend used to say that to me)
87. DO YOU WEAR GLASSES?
Only if I’m not being social, or not feeling well. Otherwise I wear contacts.
88. SIBLINGS?
One step-brother, one step-sister-in-law, one step-brother-in-law, and two sisters-in-law.
89. FAVORITE MONTH?
July, my birthday month. And October, because I like autumn and Hallowe’en.
90. YOU LIKE SUSHI?
Hells yeah.
91. LAST THING YOU WATCHED?
My Fair Lady – I even watched the special features that had Audrey Hepburn singing her own songs.
92. FAVORITE DAY OF THE YEAR?
Saturday.
93. ARE YOU TOO SHY TO ASK SOMEONE OUT?
Yes, but not too shy to jump their bones.
94. SUMMER OR WINTER?
Summer. I hate being cold.
95. KISSES OR HUGS?
Depends from who. Some people are lousy kissers but great huggers, and vice-versa. Luckily, my husband is great at both.
96. RELATIONSHIPS OR ONE NIGHT STANDS?
There’s something to be said for both. But not simultaneously. Unless it’s agreed upon beforehand.
97. WHO IS THE MOST LIKELY TO ANSWER THESE QUESTIONS?
No one I know.
98. WHO IS THE LEAST LIKELY TO ANSWER THESE QUESTIONS?
I’m not asking anyone else to answer these questions.
99. WHAT BOOKS ARE YOU READING?
I just finished Friday by Robert Heinlein, and I’m re-reading Alice in Wonderland by Lewis Carroll.
100. IS ANYONE IN LOVE WITH YOU?
My husband had better be, or there’ll be trouble.
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