I heard this story about Pakistanis apparently fleeing in droves to Canada to escape the tyranny of the United States on NPR's All Things Considered yesterday evening.

Apparently, the big bad U.S. government wants immigrants to check in with the INS (gosh, why would we want that?...and what a horribly oppressive demand to make!). Some Pakistanis, whose visas expired long ago or whose papers are not in order, would rather flee the oppression of the United States rather than actually register and face deportation.

Dear god, the inhumanity!

I have to say, friends and fellow Americans, I never thought I would see this day, when the United States, after suffering a crippling terrorist attack, would resort to politely asking immigrants to register with the INS.

Imagine my horror at hearing such a story. Those poor, poor people who are in our country illegally. I can completely understand their point of view. Why should they be asked to actually register with our immigration service? Aren't we the land of the free? Don't we have any sense of decorum, let alone justice?

My god...imagine what it must be like to live in a country illegally, taking advantage of its governmental protection and services without paying its taxes. And one day, just because a bunch of guys slaughtered 3,000 American citizens, this horrible, oppressive regime demands that you check in! And if you're not supposed to be here, they have the gall to send you back to your home country.

This is a dark blight on America, my friends. We all have cause to hang our heads in shame.

Really, the best thing we could do for illegal immigrants, especially those from countries that harbor virulent anti-American sentiments, is to leave them be. Or better yet, put them up in condos with taxpayer money. That's what we'd do if we were really a compassionate people.