Well, it's not going to be with this piddling shit about Bush's National Guard service. As Bush himself has said, this has come up in every race for every office he's run for. I honestly don't think it's going to make a bit of difference. First of all, most of the public is suffering from Vietnam fatigue. Second, all it does is reinforce the view of Bush as a wild youth reformed. If we found out he verifiably snorted coke, stole, went AWOL, and engaged in other lewd and lascivious acts, all that would do is reinforce the image of Bush reformed, Bush the born-again Christian, Bush the bad boy who married the woman who straightened his ass up. And people eat that crap up.

So going after Bush's NG record is pretty fruitless and dumb.

So how would you hurt Bush? How would you win?

I'll tell you a few things I'd like to hear out of the Democratic Party, and what I'd advise on the campaign trail that might possibly, in a million years, get me to vote for them...or at least have some respect for them:

1) The Economy -- Quit talking like it's in the crapper. It's not. Hell, when Alan Greenspan, Yoda of the Fed, is upbeat about the economy, enough to raise interest rates, you sound like a goofus when you talk doom and gloom.

What they should be talking about instead of this goofy "Two Americas" existing now, are "Two Americas", today and tomorrow. The Dems should be talking about the $422 billion deficit projected this year. They should be hammering Bush's irresponsible economic policies.

Soundbites for Kerry:

"We have to win this war, and we have to continue to make America a better place. But Bush is mortgaging our children's future to do so. We need to think not only about what kind of world we want to live in today, but what kind of America we're going to hand over to our children."

"Bush says we can't go back to the days of tax-and-spend policy. Meanwhile, this President has presided over the largest expansion of our government in history. I guess that makes him a 'cut-tax and spend conservative'."

2) Iraq -- Fuck, I don't care. Just take a coherent position. If he were against the war, at least it would be an understandable and principled. But he says it was "the wrong war, at the wrong time". But then he says he'd vote for it again if given the chance. When Russert asked him point-blank if he thought the war was a bad idea, he'd only say "The way it was done, it was." He's trying to have it both ways, appearing sort of anti-war to the Deaniac element of his own party, while looking tough to the people who still think the war was a good idea. And as a result he looks and sounds completely incoherent.

Soundbites for Kerry:

Either...

"This war was a mistake, plain and simple. Saddam was in his box, and posed no threat to either his neighbors or the United States. The inspectors would have confirmed the complete absence of weapons if given the chance, but this Administration did not give them that chance. The war was wrong, and as Commander-in-Chief I would not, and will not, make the same mistake."

Or...

"I supported this war. I would have handled it differently, and planned better for the aftermath, but let there be no mistake: Saddam had to be dealt with. President Clinton knew this, and so did this President. But while our military did a superb job in accomplishing their objectives, sadly their civilian commanders did not. We need not only strong leadership, but sensible, responsible leadership, that can plan and prepare before taking action."

3) Vision -- The Democrats used to have this. There was a President with the initials JFK who had it in full. That JFK's most famous words talked about sacrificing for your country and your world, about trying harder to make it a better place. He talked about doing things that no one had ever thought possible, and he laid the ground for them to happen. That was inspiration...that was vision. Kerry, on the other hand, has about as much vision as a cross-eyed tree sloth. He's about as inspirational as a wet sock. Dammit, don't just talk about how we need to bring our troops home and bring our jobs home. It sounds like we're rolling up the sidewalks. It sounds insular. It sounds small-minded.

Talk about how the world is becoming interconnected as never before (show that you have a grasp of the current geo-political conditions). Talk about how the world has changed and how America's going to be a force for good in the new century. Talk about how little foreign aid we give and how other nations' problems are our problems, how other nations' poverty is our poverty, how other nations' diseases are our diseases, and how other nations' lack of freedom affects us all. Talk about how we need to do more, not just with our guns, but with our hearts, how we need to devote more to fighting old scourges like malaria and new ones like AIDS, how we need to actively promote freedom in other countries, especially those we call our allies, and how we don't just need 'opportunity zones' in America, but in the world.

Talk about how we're going to become less dependent on foreign sources of energy, through a combination of sacrifice and innovation.

But for fuck's sake, talk about something that can take hold of our imagination.

Hell, I don't know if any of this would work, and I don't really see it happening. But I'd damn sure like to hear more of it.