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Hi everyone it's Jim Farris here for the all new "Silly Thinking With Douglas Lain Now Union Made".
And now it's time for our special feature to mark the anniversary of 9/11 entitled:
"Celebrity Post 9/11 Resolutions" these are resolutions made by celebrites after 9/11...see?
Here we go....
1. Woody Allen (filmmaker and life long New Yorker). Vowed he would not make a good movie until all the terrorists were found.
2.Ted Kennedy. Went on a "reverse fast" eating continually until the terrorists were brought to justice.
3.Osama Ben Laden. Vacation in the Pochonos until this mess is sorted out.
4.George W. Bush. Destroy the constitution and make America a police state.
5.Saddam Hussien. Knowing the U.S. would do everything in thier power to destroy him, did nothing aggressive, stopped weapons development, abided by the UN resolutions.
6. Bob Hope. Said if we did not capture Osama Ben Laden by the summer of '03 would drop dead.
7. Molly Ringwald. Would not appear in a film unitl war on terror was won by the U.S.
8. Lorne Michaels. Despite horrible writing, plummeting ratings, and awful reviews vowed to continue "Saturday Night Live" as long as one terrorist was still free.
9. Dan Akroyd. Did and said nothing but was desperate for some pub. today.
10. Travis Bickle and Rupert Pupkin. Would start a night club act as a team in protest of terror attacks. (Note: have never been seen together since making that announcement).
11.Vice President Dick Cheney. Follow life long formula of tragedy + Dick Cheney= $$$ for Dick Cheney.
For all of us here at "Silly Thinking with Douglas Lain Now Union Made", Lloyd Bridges, Bob Crane, Bill Bixby, Pete Duell, and our entire Con-Agri family of products we wish you a peaceful 9/11/03.
And now it's time for our special feature to mark the anniversary of 9/11 entitled:
"Celebrity Post 9/11 Resolutions" these are resolutions made by celebrites after 9/11...see?
Here we go....
1. Woody Allen (filmmaker and life long New Yorker). Vowed he would not make a good movie until all the terrorists were found.
2.Ted Kennedy. Went on a "reverse fast" eating continually until the terrorists were brought to justice.
3.Osama Ben Laden. Vacation in the Pochonos until this mess is sorted out.
4.George W. Bush. Destroy the constitution and make America a police state.
5.Saddam Hussien. Knowing the U.S. would do everything in thier power to destroy him, did nothing aggressive, stopped weapons development, abided by the UN resolutions.
6. Bob Hope. Said if we did not capture Osama Ben Laden by the summer of '03 would drop dead.
7. Molly Ringwald. Would not appear in a film unitl war on terror was won by the U.S.
8. Lorne Michaels. Despite horrible writing, plummeting ratings, and awful reviews vowed to continue "Saturday Night Live" as long as one terrorist was still free.
9. Dan Akroyd. Did and said nothing but was desperate for some pub. today.
10. Travis Bickle and Rupert Pupkin. Would start a night club act as a team in protest of terror attacks. (Note: have never been seen together since making that announcement).
11.Vice President Dick Cheney. Follow life long formula of tragedy + Dick Cheney= $$$ for Dick Cheney.
For all of us here at "Silly Thinking with Douglas Lain Now Union Made", Lloyd Bridges, Bob Crane, Bill Bixby, Pete Duell, and our entire Con-Agri family of products we wish you a peaceful 9/11/03.
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