Silly Thinking
*with Jim Farris*
2011412 Curiosities served
celEbrinet
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Hi reader and welcome to "Silly Thinking With Douglas Lain" now union made.
It's Tuesday and that means it's time to explore the world of celebrity and show biz with our own Sy Gold on the Celebrinet. So let's go to Ft. Lauderdale, Florida and Mister SY GOLD!!!....
Hiya kiddies. We have a jampacked "Celebrinet" today just bursting with juicy tidbits so LET'S GO TO PRESS...AND REMEMBER YOU READ IT HERE FIRST!!!!!
FLASH!!!
Former popster and WINGS front man PAULIE McARTNOTIC was steamin' mad last week when a Canadian DJ called 'im on 'is personal cell phone and claimed to be Canadian PM JEAN CHRETIEN!!!
It seems the the Montreal record player said he wanted the writer of hits like "Queen Of The House" and "House In The Country" to recieve the Order Of Canada and invited PAULIE and his new wife HEATHER to dinner.When it was revealed to be a prank, the RINGO wannabe wanted to sue 'im for a million dollars POUNDS STERLING!!
Someone then told THE THICK HEADED HUMORLESS MOPTOP it WAS A JOKE AND 'E WAS ON THE AIR!!! PAULIE DECIDED TO DROP THE LAWSUIT AND LAUGHED IT OFF ADLIBBING "You Canadian's are funny." What a funny retort... eyye what????!!!!
YOU READ IT HERE FIRST!!!
That wasn't the first time the Merry Canadian vinyl spinner has pulled one on the rich and famous. Last year AUDETTE called our own SORTA VIRGIN BRINTEY SPEARS claiming to be CELINE DION and actually convinced EMPTY HEADED BRIT to sing a duet with TIGER WOODS called (get this) "Let's Make A Hole In One"!!!! AND THAT'SSSS THE TRUTTTTHH!!!
TOMMY(NO CHEECH AND) CHONG is appealing his conviction on drug charges for selling bongs on the internet. The FOGGED IN FORMER COMEDIAN is serving a nine month stint in the GREYBAR HOTEL on the charge but his lawyer is appealing ALL OVER THE PLACE. Sez Chong is off pot and wants to help keep kiddies drug free.
my question to TOMMY is... THEN WHYDYA SELL BONGS ON THE COMPUTER BRAINIAC??
By the way the POTHEAD is staying in "A PRIVATLY OWNED MINIMUM SECURITY FACILITY RUN FOR THE FEDERAL BUREAU OF PRISONS" in SOCAL. Sounds like BOB HOPE'S HOUSE!!
THE PRINCESS OF ROCK 'N ROLL LISA MARIE PRESLEY will remarry her husband of ONE MONTH!!!! OSCAR (HOW'D THAT HAPPEN???) WINNER NICKY CAGE!!!!! in the spring. The couple were married last year and split 30 days to the day later. SOMEONE CLOSE SAYS "THEY BOTH REALIZED THEIR IN LOVE AND NIC PURPOSED...AGAIN!"
THE NUTSY POO COUPLE will tie the knot in a VERY PRIVATE ULTRA TASTEFUL CEREMONY at the Amusement park that LISEL'S MOM MADE out of her DAD'S former home (and the birthplace of our own DOUGGLY WOUGGLY LAIN) GRACELAND!!!!
WHERE TO DIVORCE A MONTH LATER...DOLLYWOOD?????
BEN-O AFFLACK is BACK IN THE NEWS! A North Carolina judge dismissed a warrant against ALMOST MRS J-LO that a woman brought against the thick-as-a-brick... actor?
TARA RAY CLAIMED BEN-O threatned her!Turns out TARA is cuckoo and BEN-O is free as a DODO BIRD.
I DON'T MAKE THIS STUFF UP!!
HEY KIDDIES REMEMBER THOSE FREAKAZOIDS WHO CLAIMED TO CLONE AN ALIEN BABY? THE RAELIAN CULT? 'MEMBER THEM?
Well JELLO FACED OLD COMEDIAN RODNEY (NO RESPECT) DANGEFIELD has met with RAELIANS founder (and cuckoo spokesdoctor) BRIGITTE BOISSELIER (IN- WHERE ELSE- LALA LAND L.A.) and reportedly wants to CLONE HIMSELF! "Doctor" BOISSELEIR sez they will make a perfect clone of DANGERFIELD by removing part of his cheek and THEY WILL DO IT FOR FREE!!!
KIDDIES... WITH THIS KIND OF CELEBRINET NEWS You kinda want some nice normal celebrity like MICHEAL JACKSON to do something... ya know what I mean?
Well dat's it (and dat's enuff) stay right here to play THAT CRAZY CELEBRITY MIX 'N MATCH PHOTO CRAZY GAME THAT GRACELAND'S GREATEST SON DOUGGLY WOUGGLY LAIN HAS COMING UP AND JOIN DOUGGLY TOMMOROW FOR A HOT HOT HOT LOOK AT COMMIE HOTTIES!!!
BOYS AND GIRLS I SEEN IT AND IT IS HOT!!!
SEE YA NEXT WEEK KIDDIES AND REMEMBER... YOU READ IT HERE FIRST!!!!!
Remember to enter your choices for todays mix-n-match celebrity photo crazy game! Here are last week's crazy answers! Woah!!!
1. Dogs that play poker and drink beer love Tarantino's early pictures.
2. Jimmy Kimmel looks like a drunk monkey.
3. Flowers are narcissus. Britney is narcissistic.
4. Trees in love look like Goldblum and Davis, doncha think?
5. Nicole Kidman is hot.
6. Meg Ryan is on a rampage.
7. I love animals playing poker.
This week Molly Ringwald sez:
I love animals playing poker!
It's Tuesday and that means it's time to explore the world of celebrity and show biz with our own Sy Gold on the Celebrinet. So let's go to Ft. Lauderdale, Florida and Mister SY GOLD!!!....
Hiya kiddies. We have a jampacked "Celebrinet" today just bursting with juicy tidbits so LET'S GO TO PRESS...AND REMEMBER YOU READ IT HERE FIRST!!!!!
FLASH!!!
Former popster and WINGS front man PAULIE McARTNOTIC was steamin' mad last week when a Canadian DJ called 'im on 'is personal cell phone and claimed to be Canadian PM JEAN CHRETIEN!!!
It seems the the Montreal record player said he wanted the writer of hits like "Queen Of The House" and "House In The Country" to recieve the Order Of Canada and invited PAULIE and his new wife HEATHER to dinner.When it was revealed to be a prank, the RINGO wannabe wanted to sue 'im for a million dollars POUNDS STERLING!!
Someone then told THE THICK HEADED HUMORLESS MOPTOP it WAS A JOKE AND 'E WAS ON THE AIR!!! PAULIE DECIDED TO DROP THE LAWSUIT AND LAUGHED IT OFF ADLIBBING "You Canadian's are funny." What a funny retort... eyye what????!!!!
YOU READ IT HERE FIRST!!!
That wasn't the first time the Merry Canadian vinyl spinner has pulled one on the rich and famous. Last year AUDETTE called our own SORTA VIRGIN BRINTEY SPEARS claiming to be CELINE DION and actually convinced EMPTY HEADED BRIT to sing a duet with TIGER WOODS called (get this) "Let's Make A Hole In One"!!!! AND THAT'SSSS THE TRUTTTTHH!!!
TOMMY(NO CHEECH AND) CHONG is appealing his conviction on drug charges for selling bongs on the internet. The FOGGED IN FORMER COMEDIAN is serving a nine month stint in the GREYBAR HOTEL on the charge but his lawyer is appealing ALL OVER THE PLACE. Sez Chong is off pot and wants to help keep kiddies drug free.
my question to TOMMY is... THEN WHYDYA SELL BONGS ON THE COMPUTER BRAINIAC??
By the way the POTHEAD is staying in "A PRIVATLY OWNED MINIMUM SECURITY FACILITY RUN FOR THE FEDERAL BUREAU OF PRISONS" in SOCAL. Sounds like BOB HOPE'S HOUSE!!
THE PRINCESS OF ROCK 'N ROLL LISA MARIE PRESLEY will remarry her husband of ONE MONTH!!!! OSCAR (HOW'D THAT HAPPEN???) WINNER NICKY CAGE!!!!! in the spring. The couple were married last year and split 30 days to the day later. SOMEONE CLOSE SAYS "THEY BOTH REALIZED THEIR IN LOVE AND NIC PURPOSED...AGAIN!"
THE NUTSY POO COUPLE will tie the knot in a VERY PRIVATE ULTRA TASTEFUL CEREMONY at the Amusement park that LISEL'S MOM MADE out of her DAD'S former home (and the birthplace of our own DOUGGLY WOUGGLY LAIN) GRACELAND!!!!
WHERE TO DIVORCE A MONTH LATER...DOLLYWOOD?????
BEN-O AFFLACK is BACK IN THE NEWS! A North Carolina judge dismissed a warrant against ALMOST MRS J-LO that a woman brought against the thick-as-a-brick... actor?
TARA RAY CLAIMED BEN-O threatned her!Turns out TARA is cuckoo and BEN-O is free as a DODO BIRD.
I DON'T MAKE THIS STUFF UP!!
HEY KIDDIES REMEMBER THOSE FREAKAZOIDS WHO CLAIMED TO CLONE AN ALIEN BABY? THE RAELIAN CULT? 'MEMBER THEM?
Well JELLO FACED OLD COMEDIAN RODNEY (NO RESPECT) DANGEFIELD has met with RAELIANS founder (and cuckoo spokesdoctor) BRIGITTE BOISSELIER (IN- WHERE ELSE- LALA LAND L.A.) and reportedly wants to CLONE HIMSELF! "Doctor" BOISSELEIR sez they will make a perfect clone of DANGERFIELD by removing part of his cheek and THEY WILL DO IT FOR FREE!!!
KIDDIES... WITH THIS KIND OF CELEBRINET NEWS You kinda want some nice normal celebrity like MICHEAL JACKSON to do something... ya know what I mean?
Well dat's it (and dat's enuff) stay right here to play THAT CRAZY CELEBRITY MIX 'N MATCH PHOTO CRAZY GAME THAT GRACELAND'S GREATEST SON DOUGGLY WOUGGLY LAIN HAS COMING UP AND JOIN DOUGGLY TOMMOROW FOR A HOT HOT HOT LOOK AT COMMIE HOTTIES!!!
BOYS AND GIRLS I SEEN IT AND IT IS HOT!!!
SEE YA NEXT WEEK KIDDIES AND REMEMBER... YOU READ IT HERE FIRST!!!!!
Remember to enter your choices for todays mix-n-match celebrity photo crazy game! Here are last week's crazy answers! Woah!!!
1. Dogs that play poker and drink beer love Tarantino's early pictures.
2. Jimmy Kimmel looks like a drunk monkey.
3. Flowers are narcissus. Britney is narcissistic.
4. Trees in love look like Goldblum and Davis, doncha think?
5. Nicole Kidman is hot.
6. Meg Ryan is on a rampage.
7. I love animals playing poker.
This week Molly Ringwald sez:
I love animals playing poker!
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