Silly Thinking
*with Jim Farris*
2011554 Curiosities served
BREAKING NEWS: CLARK TO QUIT
Previous Entry :: Next Entry
Read/Post Comments (0)
THIS IS SILLY THINKING BREAKING NEWS.
From New York here is Connie Chung.
CC: Good evening. Silly Thinking News has confirmed that General Wesley Clark will quit his presidential campaign tommorow. After a disasterous night in Tennesee and Virginia, Clark see's nowhere to go and nothing to do.
The man who entered the race late and got a boost soon there after skipped the Iowa caucusses, went to New Hampshire, and had a dissapointing showing.
It's been all down hill from there despite a close victory last week someplace.
Joining me now to discuss the General's decision is another decorated American service man: G.I. Joe.
Barbie: Good evening, Connie.
CC: Barbie! What the hell... we were supposed to talk to G.I. Joe.... just a minute I have to interrupt myself. Wesley Clark's campaign manager is announcing what we just announced.
He is saying that "Wesley Clark discussed this painful decision with his family and decided moments ago to end his quest for the Presidency which he will do in Little Rock, Arkansas tomorrow at 3 pm eastern time."
I am just recieving information that General Clark's wife was instrumental in his decision to abandon all hope and quit.
Barbie, bieng a female doll, I'm sure you have some insight into Mrs. Clark's input in the decision.
Slinky:... .... ....
CC: Slinky!
Barbie: Sorry, Skipper, but when you went off I went into my dream kitchen for a snack here in my dream house.
CC: What do you think of Mrs. Clark's role in the General's decision to quit?
B: I dunno. Maybe they could go to an ice cream parlor with their friends! Or go on a movie date with Ken!
CC: Even though women are not running for President, tonight a females input made the difference.
B: Huh uhh. I guess. Maybe Mrs. Clark could become a photographer and go on an international cruise or become a news person.
Ken could drive a car.
CC: Do you mean Wesley? Wesley Clark could drive a car?
B: Or become a rock star.
CC: Thank you Barbie. In other news: early polling in Wisconsin shows Dr. Howard The Duck, who had decided to make a last stand in the buttermilk state, and then reversed himself vowing to fight on is showing up with 9% of the vote and coming in fifth. They must have seen him at the elementary school today where he compared human urine to drinking water. I didn't make that up. He really did that. He ended by saying "... now don't go home and tell your parents that Howard Dean said to drink urine." He was pointing out that drinking water has bacteria while urine does not.
Why? We don't know.
Increasingly it looks like Dr. Pissant is not going to be factor anywhere except maybe Canada.
Well we'll be back if more news breaks.
I'm Connie Chung. For now. Goodnight.
This has been a Silly Thinking SPECIAL BREAKING NEWS REPORT. Breaking News: a new dedication to Silly Thinking.
Silly Thinking presents Jim Farris presenting Douglas Lain. It really is here. It really is. I know it is.
From New York here is Connie Chung.
CC: Good evening. Silly Thinking News has confirmed that General Wesley Clark will quit his presidential campaign tommorow. After a disasterous night in Tennesee and Virginia, Clark see's nowhere to go and nothing to do.
The man who entered the race late and got a boost soon there after skipped the Iowa caucusses, went to New Hampshire, and had a dissapointing showing.
It's been all down hill from there despite a close victory last week someplace.
Joining me now to discuss the General's decision is another decorated American service man: G.I. Joe.
Barbie: Good evening, Connie.
CC: Barbie! What the hell... we were supposed to talk to G.I. Joe.... just a minute I have to interrupt myself. Wesley Clark's campaign manager is announcing what we just announced.
He is saying that "Wesley Clark discussed this painful decision with his family and decided moments ago to end his quest for the Presidency which he will do in Little Rock, Arkansas tomorrow at 3 pm eastern time."
I am just recieving information that General Clark's wife was instrumental in his decision to abandon all hope and quit.
Barbie, bieng a female doll, I'm sure you have some insight into Mrs. Clark's input in the decision.
Slinky:... .... ....
CC: Slinky!
Barbie: Sorry, Skipper, but when you went off I went into my dream kitchen for a snack here in my dream house.
CC: What do you think of Mrs. Clark's role in the General's decision to quit?
B: I dunno. Maybe they could go to an ice cream parlor with their friends! Or go on a movie date with Ken!
CC: Even though women are not running for President, tonight a females input made the difference.
B: Huh uhh. I guess. Maybe Mrs. Clark could become a photographer and go on an international cruise or become a news person.
Ken could drive a car.
CC: Do you mean Wesley? Wesley Clark could drive a car?
B: Or become a rock star.
CC: Thank you Barbie. In other news: early polling in Wisconsin shows Dr. Howard The Duck, who had decided to make a last stand in the buttermilk state, and then reversed himself vowing to fight on is showing up with 9% of the vote and coming in fifth. They must have seen him at the elementary school today where he compared human urine to drinking water. I didn't make that up. He really did that. He ended by saying "... now don't go home and tell your parents that Howard Dean said to drink urine." He was pointing out that drinking water has bacteria while urine does not.
Why? We don't know.
Increasingly it looks like Dr. Pissant is not going to be factor anywhere except maybe Canada.
Well we'll be back if more news breaks.
I'm Connie Chung. For now. Goodnight.
This has been a Silly Thinking SPECIAL BREAKING NEWS REPORT. Breaking News: a new dedication to Silly Thinking.
Silly Thinking presents Jim Farris presenting Douglas Lain. It really is here. It really is. I know it is.
Read/Post Comments (0)
Previous Entry :: Next Entry
Back to Top
