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BREAKING NEWS: WISCONSIN TOO CLOSE TO CALL!
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This is SILLY THINKING BREAKING NEWS.
The Wisconsin Primary.
From our New York World News Headquarters in New York, here is Connie Chung.
CC: Good evening. The polls have just closed in Wisconsin and based on our exit polling we have found the race too close to call between front runner John Kerry and John Edwards. Repeating this shocking potential upset: It's to close to call between Kerry and Edwards in the Buttermilk state of Wisconsin.
We can confirm that Doctor Howard Dean will finish a distant third and may not get out of single digits.
Joining me now to discuss this unexpected turn of events is Former President Gerald Ford, Bill Pullman who played the president in the movie "Independence Day", and Doctor Henry Kissinger.
First former President Gerald Ford.
GF: Good evening again, Barbara.
CC: President Ford how could this have happened?
GF: Barbara, the American public are the great unwashed. Who knows what they are thinking at any given time? A lot of them are uneducated and many others have been lulled to sleep by the rich and powerful.
CC: Interesting. Bill Pullman, do you agree?
BP: To a degree, Connie. But you have to take into account the underdog reputation of Wisconsin. They often do the unexpected.
CC: Interesting. Doctor Kissinger, do you agree with that assesment.
HK: Vell, Connie. You know...it's a race right? I mean races are just that. It's a race. You have to wait to the vinish line and give flowers to da vinner at the vinish line. Not out of de gate.
CC: Interesting. Bill Pullman what do you think of Howard Dean's horrible showing so far?
BP: Connie, no hard numbers are in. Also, you have to remember that there was a well organized campaign within the Democratic party to destroy Howard Dean and it seems to have worked. I think they drugged him and made him act like an idiot.
CC: Interesting. President Ford what do you think?
GF: Barbara, that happens. They did that to me.
CC: I have to interrupt you, Mister Nixon. John Edwards is on the live line LIVE.
Good evening, John Edwards.
JE: Good evening, Connie.
CC: Senator, are you shocked at your amazing showing so far tonight?
JE: No. Connie, I knew we campaigned hard.
CC: Interesting. Are you looking ahead to Super Tuesday?
JE: I can't wait. I can't tell you how much I'm looking forward to that night.
CC: Try.
JE: I'm looking forward to that night.
CC: Interesting. Thank you very much and congratulations on a good showing so far tonight.
JE: Thank you, Connie.
CC: Interesting. We will be back when we can declare a winner in this shocking to close to call battle in Wisconsin. Until then this is Connie Chung. See you later.
This has been BREAKING NEWS from Silly Thinking. Stay with Silly Thinking for more Primary news as it happens.
Jim Farris Presents Silly Thinking with Douglas Lain.
Here.
The Wisconsin Primary.
From our New York World News Headquarters in New York, here is Connie Chung.
CC: Good evening. The polls have just closed in Wisconsin and based on our exit polling we have found the race too close to call between front runner John Kerry and John Edwards. Repeating this shocking potential upset: It's to close to call between Kerry and Edwards in the Buttermilk state of Wisconsin.
We can confirm that Doctor Howard Dean will finish a distant third and may not get out of single digits.
Joining me now to discuss this unexpected turn of events is Former President Gerald Ford, Bill Pullman who played the president in the movie "Independence Day", and Doctor Henry Kissinger.
First former President Gerald Ford.
GF: Good evening again, Barbara.
CC: President Ford how could this have happened?
GF: Barbara, the American public are the great unwashed. Who knows what they are thinking at any given time? A lot of them are uneducated and many others have been lulled to sleep by the rich and powerful.
CC: Interesting. Bill Pullman, do you agree?
BP: To a degree, Connie. But you have to take into account the underdog reputation of Wisconsin. They often do the unexpected.
CC: Interesting. Doctor Kissinger, do you agree with that assesment.
HK: Vell, Connie. You know...it's a race right? I mean races are just that. It's a race. You have to wait to the vinish line and give flowers to da vinner at the vinish line. Not out of de gate.
CC: Interesting. Bill Pullman what do you think of Howard Dean's horrible showing so far?
BP: Connie, no hard numbers are in. Also, you have to remember that there was a well organized campaign within the Democratic party to destroy Howard Dean and it seems to have worked. I think they drugged him and made him act like an idiot.
CC: Interesting. President Ford what do you think?
GF: Barbara, that happens. They did that to me.
CC: I have to interrupt you, Mister Nixon. John Edwards is on the live line LIVE.
Good evening, John Edwards.
JE: Good evening, Connie.
CC: Senator, are you shocked at your amazing showing so far tonight?
JE: No. Connie, I knew we campaigned hard.
CC: Interesting. Are you looking ahead to Super Tuesday?
JE: I can't wait. I can't tell you how much I'm looking forward to that night.
CC: Try.
JE: I'm looking forward to that night.
CC: Interesting. Thank you very much and congratulations on a good showing so far tonight.
JE: Thank you, Connie.
CC: Interesting. We will be back when we can declare a winner in this shocking to close to call battle in Wisconsin. Until then this is Connie Chung. See you later.
This has been BREAKING NEWS from Silly Thinking. Stay with Silly Thinking for more Primary news as it happens.
Jim Farris Presents Silly Thinking with Douglas Lain.
Here.
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