Silly Thinking

Our weeklong rememberance of "The Marlon Brando Show" continues with a program from November 21st 2003.




From Hollywood!



It's The Marlon Brando Show. Starring Marlon Brando.


Marlon's guest tonight...

CNN talk show host LARRY KING!




Political commentator and author ANN COULTER!


And musical group ELO!



With Sy Henderson and the Marlon Brando Orchestra.



I'm Leonard Peltier....

and now MARLON BRANDO!!!


MB: Thank you ladies and gentlemen. Thank you. Welcome. Thank you.
Now shut up!
We've had a busy week here. As you may know last week we had my good friend Michael Jackson on our show and... well, I'm not supposed to talk about it, but he... well Michael's in a little trouble now. And we had the Sheriff's deputies here asking questions. They asked me about never never land and Michael's kid Bubbles and all that sort of thing. They wanted a tape of the show; they wanted to see it. I told them to buy a set for Christ sake. ANyhow, we wish Michael well and.. that's all I'm going to say about it. Except I think it's a witch hunt. Like in the MEDIEVAL days. A witch hunt.
Ann Coulter.


AC: Thank you, Marlon. Thank you.


MB: Now, Coulter, What is your story? You wrote this book titled "Treason" where you say everyone who disagrees with you should be tried for treason.


AC: Well, not exactly.


MB: And everyone who disagrees with you are lefties? You know, left wingers?


AC: Liberals, Marlon.


MB: You know if one is tried for treason one is hung. Choked to death.


AC: Yes. Well, these people are traitors and...


MB: You are a pig., an animal. You come from a pampered spoiled background and you have no compassion or brains.


AC: Now wait a minute, you don't know anything about my life.


MB: I know that you're a pig and a little girl and you make me sick.


AC: I can't believe you're talking to me this way.


MB: Believe it, pig. Hey, Peltier?


LP: Yes sir?


MB: You wanna ask pig girl here a question?


LP:Yes. Miss Coulter, hello.


AC: I don't even know why you are here, or why you're allowed out of your prison cell.


MB: Shut up, swine! Leonard is talking.


LP: Thank you, Marlon. Why do say that Miss Coulter?


AC: You're a criminal, a terrorist. The fact that liberals would show you sympathy or try to "protect your rights" is just another demonstration of how much they hate America.


LP: Miss Coulter, you have an outward appearance of beauty but your inner darkness taints you. You're really an ugly ugly person, a hideous beast.
In fact I was framed, and the American Indian Movement was sabotaged by the Federal Government.

AC: You're a copkiller...


MB: You had your turn you beast pig. Hey, Sy, You wanna ask this tramp a question?


SH: Uhhh. Well, I guess. Uhh. Miss Coulter, what kind of music do you like?


AC: Music? Uhh, well Smokey Robinson and The Miracles and Oh yes. I loved The Carpenters.


SH: You asshole! I ought to come over there and beat you within an inch of your life.


AC: What? Because of the music I like? What is this?


MB: Shut up! The Carpenters? Have you no decency? My God! I am this close to slapping you myself. Get out, and take your book with you. You fucking pig whore.

(Coulter leaves as Brando throws her book hitting her in the back.)


MB: I enjoyed that. And now the king of talk Larry King.

(King enters and he and Marlon kiss)


LK: Hi, folks. Hiya, Marlon. It's happening. Remember when I had you on my show and you kept trying to turn the questions onto me, and I said one day we'd do it the other way and you could interview me? Well now it's happening.


MB: Larry, Larry, Larry. How are you my friend? What the hell are you talking about?


LK: I'm great. But you, look at this show. What a show this is. Great Marlon. The Marlon Brando Show.

(applause)


MB: You are the best.


LK: You got your own show.


MB: Brilliant, Larry. Very perceptive. You know King, after that insightful interview with Porky Pig there I don't really have the stomach for mindless chatter about your insipid little life.


LK: Coulter is really mad, Marlon.


MB: Yeah? Well, fuck her. Larry, it's nothing personal, but I just want to go do something real now. Not sit here and talk to some schmuck about nothing. Because you are about nothing.


LK: It's true.


MB: I know, I know. Do you mind if I just cut this off?


LK: Hey, no. It's your show, Marlon.


MB: Nothing personal.


LK: Oh. You can't offend me. I have so no real human emotion left. You know. I don't give a damn about anything anymore.


MB: I love you, Mister Nothing.


LK: Sure.


MB: Good night, everybody.


LP: Mister Brando's wardrobe by Native Girls on his private island. This is a Mar-Bran Doug Woug Production in association with Harpo Productions. This Blog was recorded.