You can guess which of the following is true and which is not, thanks to April Fools if you like... I'll tell you now that it's all true.

Wheaten has been especially whiny and bored the last several days, which means he does every single thing he knows he shouldn't do. (Most people have squirt bottles to deter their cats, I have a Super Soaker.) Since he's been so constantly on my mind, here's a short and I'm certain incomplete list of the things Wheaton enjoys ingesting:

ribbon straight off the spool is his favorite, especially shiny ribbon

any string a toy is attached to he learned early on how to make toys on a string run free. He can saw through the string with surprising swiftness, and then eats as much string as he can so you don't try to reuse it.

iced tea I've caught him several times on the table drinking our tea. He also enjoys batting at the ice cubes.

barbecue pork Actually, pork of any kind seems to be a favorite. My mental image of the herd of house-cats taking down a boar intrudes...

steak Oh yeah. Ditto previous mental image and substitute cow for boar. He is not, however, a fan of unseasoned burger.

green bean water You know the liquid canned green beans come in? He was going nuts, and I was convinced that I didn't have what he thought I had. I was wrong.

water chestnut water ...but bamboo shoot water does not entice.

raspberry pie but not apple, strangely

bread Especially flavored with meat, but even plain bread is acceptable on occasion

flour tortilla see bread

spaghetti with marinara. He especially likes mushrooms in his sauce.

fettucini alfredo I suspect I could slip anything in the alfredo sauce and he'd eat it, but I'm not positive. He has eaten small peppers this way.

tuna fish Well, duh.

baked cod Sean used to bring it home from work as a special treat for Wheaten. Wheaten was so well behaved those days...

rose petals The boy loves rose petals. Dry or fresh doesn't seem to matter, and no, he doesn't just eat them to puke them up (he's only managed to get a few, though). The moment he catches a whiff he's rubbing legs and scaling refrigerators just to get a taste...

anything Sierra wants Gods forfend I try to discover if Sierra wants something, which is rare (she won't even eat canned cat food--only dry cat food for her, and she's picky about it). Sierra will, however, eat occasional small bits of cheese, lick melted ice cream off my finger (we used to share Dove bars before the boys moved in), and enjoy cream about once a year, if Wheaten leaves her alone long enough to enjoy it.

Both cats go crazy for wheat grass. Sierra is alone in her zest for nutritional yeast.

That ought to be something for your edification and amusement. If I think of anything else truly odd, I will add it here...