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Guruzilla's /var/log/knowledge-junkie ["the chatter of a missionary sysadmin"] 2003-03-14 11:26 PM "my not-in-a-million-incarnations list" Previous Entry :: Next Entry |
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{ Now playing: mp3 play list 'new spring 03' Recent movie: Godzilla vs. King Ghidorah (double-subbed laserdisc boot)*****; Godzilla 2000: Millenium (subbed boot)***** Current books: Genesis; Schiokanauer, A Brief History of Chinese and Japanese Civilizations; Schlatter, The History of the Christ; Glen Cook, The Black Company; Sanseido/Brennan, Power Japanese: Common Japanese Business Phrases; A. L. Herman, A Brief Introduction to Hinduism } Oh, yeah, one more for my 'not-in-a-million-incarnations' list. I am forced to reject, in spite of lots of interesting bits, Hinduism, pretty much at its core. I find it entirely impossible to propose a solution to the human dilemma which simply says, Thou Shalt Not Be Human, that is, that I (that you) do not exist. Existence is happening. Life is here. I, we, may be bloody confused about it, baffled, delusional, deranged, hopeless and helpless, but here and now is nowhere else, no other time. Sin and compassion, breaking faith and keeping it, is the argument of the world. To deny your life with the same breath in which you pronounce the poetry of denunciation is a contradiction I utterly reject. I may be wrong, I may delude myself about God and the world, even about myself -- so be it. Perhaps I am a butterfly, dreaming of being a man, incessantly, persistently, insane in some way only a butterfly can be -- but to exist as a deranged butterfly is something, is a reality tied to air, water, trees and flowers and mantises. If I'm wrong about that, too, it doesn't particularly matter, since it'll all come out in the wash (karma cycle, lather, rinse, repeat, tumble permanent press)... Update 3/19/03: Altered potentially inflamatory title and verbiage in two spots to avoid unintended offense. |
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