Things have been going pretty well. So well, that I'm waiting for something bad to happen.

It's sad, and I know pessimistic, but if things have been too positive for a bit, I wait for something bad to happen, because it just seems unrealistic for my life to be going smoothly for too long. Like a roller coaster heading up the hill, there's that anticipation of peaking and beginning the plunge downward.

Except I like roller coasters. Well I do now.

When I was younger, I was afraid of them, and I couldn't realy ride them without freaking out. It was irrational, I knew even then, but I didn't do so well with them. Not ill, like motion sickness, but just scared. I could barely take Disneyland coasters, which are about as tame as one could get and still call them roller coasters.

Eventually, I grew past that, by making an intentional effort, and I love them now.

But I always get off at the end of a real roller coaster, and life doesn't really have a stopping point. I could do with a little more eveness in life. Not so much wild swings. So, when things are looking up long enough, I wait, and hold on tight.