Just looked at Chaplain Mom's most recent entry.

It got me thinking about my own dorm experience. Talk about drama. A few experiences in a nutshell:

-- The girl kiddy-corner from me was a bi-polar-pothead- klepto. Nickname -- Mindalee. She was supposed to take her meds (the meds that could never be regulated because her docs weren't aware she drank like a fish and loved her MJ) at bedtime and go right to bed, except that she didn't. After she took her meds she'd stay up and smoke weed and then go searching for a snack. She once showed up at my door in the middle of the night in the dead of winter in boxers and a bright pink bra. "Do you have cookies?" "No, Mindy." "Does Jaime have any cookies?" (Jaime was my roomie.) "I don't think so, Mindy." "I need cookies." "I'm sure you do." "Will you take me to Albertson's to buy cookies." "Yes, go get dressed." "I am dressed." "In real clothes Mindy, you're still in your underwear." "Oh. Yeah." Something to that effect.

-- My first Thanksgiving break in college. One of the dudes who lived upstairs who no one really knew went out drinking on Red Hill and died from exposure and who knows what else. I was buddies with his roomie (nickname: Bri-Bri) who said that everyone asked if he was getting a 4.0 because his roommate died. (And no, he had to work for his grades like everyone else.) The dude's family flew out to collect his belongings, but they left his bike locked to the bike rack. It was still there the following year, except that it was now missing the pedals, seat, and anything else anyone could steal.

-- My own roommate freshman year lasted one semester. Her nickname was "Hair and Face" -- she wasn't so great looking first thing in the morning, but when she got done with her makeup and curling irons, she'd looked pretty hot. She got dressed to stay in. In that semester she got engaged, broke up with her fiance after she found out he'd been cheating on his ex with her, fell in love several times, went on the pill (which was fun for all of us, let me tell you), worried about her suicidal step-father, got her mom and little brothers out of the house and moved away from said step-father, and racked up more debt in Clinique products than the US government did on all its "purchases" that semester. (Okay, maybe not as much.) She also started and flunked out of school. She moved out of state to work on paying off her debt.

-- My second roommate, Sophomore year -- Nicknamed "The Grinch". She was as scary as my first roommate was beautiful. The very thought of her sends chills up my spine. When mentioned among my circle of friends at the time, they still shiver.

WARNING: IF YOU ARE AT ALL SQUEAMISH, STOP READING NOW!!!










A bit after The Grinch moved in, strange things started happening to my stuff: e.g. I found blonde hairs on my deoderant. (I've never been blonde. She was.) My posters kept "falling off the wall" and flying across the room to land on my bed. I caught her masturbating on my bed while talking to her boyfriend on the phone. She said my boyfriend reminded her of a warlock (this would be Rice) and then later pointed out she always had an attraction to warlocks. Then there was the night I found a used tampon in a box of school books*. I moved out of that dorm and into another dorm that night. I had to go back the next day to sign out only to find that she'd moved into my dresser, closet, desk, bed, etc. as well as into hers. We figure she was probably trying to get rid of me all along. ::Sigh::

A few years ago, an old friend (who christened the Grinch the Grinch), ran into her at a circus. His young daughter accidentally dropped her red sno-cone down the Grinche's white-clad back. It was only when the Grinch turned around that my friend realized who she was. He seems to think it was karma at work. Used tampon = red sno-cone? Could be.

* A few years later, a friend of mine who was in her 40's and was a lot more experienced in the world than I, pointed out that the girl was probably in the heat of passion with her boyfriend (who was truly like something out of The Far Side) and removed her tampon and threw it out of the bed to dispose of it. She may not really have intended it to land in my box of books. It could be true. I was 19 at the time, and terribly unfamiliar in the ways of how such things worked and could happen... But jeez -- it's still pretty nasty.