Every morning, I go through my routine. This includes checking my bank accounts. I can’t afford to slip up, you know? Well, it wasn’t me who slipped up this time.

IT WAS SALLIE MAE, THE WHORE OF WASHINGTON, DC AND PRESUMABLY THE REST OF THE WORLD, TOO.

Once I quit my teaching job and went to school, the choice was simple: in-school deferment. Great. That worked well.

Now I’m out of school, and like the good little citizen I try to be, I let them know. And I signed up for income-sensitive repayment. The form clearly says at the bottom, “You will continue to make payments of $97.50 until you change your payment plan” or something like that. Okay, I had 30 days to send in my proof of income. It hasn’t been 30 days. But guess what she did? GUESS WHAT THAT WHORE DID?

That’s right. This morning when I checked my bank balance, Sallie Mae had withdrawn $472.73. That’s considerably more than $97.50. Exactly 4.8485 times more.

Of course I have an email into my last employer for proof of income. Of course I have RE-APPLIED for the income-sensitive program. Of course I am STEAMED BEYOND BELIEF.

Fuckers. Damn it to hell. Bastards. (Thanks, CoffeeBoy, for the use of two of the three previous epithets.)