The gym I go to has a lovely ladies locker room. Beautiful wood, nice lighting, three spacious changing rooms, and showers with over-sized curtains.

So imagine my surprise when I went there today and almost ran in to a fully undressed woman.

Apparently, she was oblivious to the spacious changing rooms.

Now, I am not shy or easily embarrassed in the face of nudity. Well, at least not when it's someone else's nudity, but this was even a bit much for me. Let's just say that this particular woman was just beginning her healthy lifestyle quest at the gym. There was a whole lot of sagging going on from a lot of different places. Scary places. Really scary places.

We locked eyes and I was paralyzed. I mean, what polite nicety do you say to a naked lady who looks like the old movie star Carol Burnett played on her show way back in the day?

In typical New Yorker fashion I managed to say, “How’s it hanging?” Well, not really, that was on the inside. What really came out of my mouth was more along the lines of, “Gaaahhhh hi…”

Once my retinas reattached I had a pretty good workout!