Man...I am so tired. It hit me just now after sem like a ton of bricks. It happened yesterday too. I had to haul myself up the stairs like I was a mountain climber or something.
Yet I still have so much to do.
I didn't go this long last fall without going home. The time has just flown by. I don't think I even noticed. It doesn't feel like six weeks. It feels like shorter and longer. Like is this really only the second time I've had my menstrual cycle since being here? Wasn't it just August? It feels like I can still touch the first Wednesday I was here six weeks ago. I'm confused. The time feels like nothing, the memories a flip moving book but my body is starting to feel it, that tiredness that pervades. It also might be just the general abuse of bruises, cold weather and a touch of arthritis that comes. It knows though. I've had trouble waking up lately and am resenting signing up to be Miss Morning just a little bit. Seldom get to sleep before midnight and waking up at 7:30 my body objects.

I'm not doing as bad as the swim team though. My Morning Boys, as I call them, made me have no reason to complain. Go to sleep at midnight, wake up at 5am for weights, class and homework and practice and work and insanity with no times for naps for those guys(and girls). I want to go to one of their meets to support them just because I seem to know a lot of swimmers this year. I don't want to be part of this athlete hate thing that our campus has, I don't want to be part of the divide. So I plan on being there to stand behind my school and my friends.

Some of the issues on campus right now are hard. I feel like part of it is ignorance on the under and upperclassmen's part. Instead of getting all mad about it we need to talk, to open a forum for discussion, where not only the people already educated about the issues show up. There needs to be break down and an acceptance on both sides.
I try to embody what the women before me were in this school, I try to keep belief. I think it shows when I talk about my school and the area. I spoke to my Spanish profesora yesterday and I think she learned a lot just from talking to me, from the information that I absorbed last year.
I think it is possible to keep this place in the spirit of what it was and can be. I think that despite the administration we can keep what we know, what the single sex women knew and keep it strong. It just needs communication and acceptance and minds that are not going to argue it or to mourn the past but realize that...like...we can keep it and change it. Sisterhood will stay with belief and diversity and acceptance...I think they are possible. At least we have this small community in which to talk about it, to deal with it face to face. I dunno. It's just like...the anger needs to come out of the equation and be interjected with faith and reason. Even if admissions is letting in people "who are not Wells" then those people will learn it or else be taught face to face what Wells was and is and maybe their minds will change or be opened. Each generation is changing but the older ones cannot leave them to flounder. We have to teach and practice to the best of our abilities and hope that it gets through. That's all.

There's more to say but I can't think of it right now. I want to think of an actual action plan before I put this out anywhere. I'll think of something.

I think my favorite professor this year is my Spanish professor. She is very easy to talk to. I love my Soc professor as well but I think it is my profesora's eagerness to learn as much it is to teach that makes me like her. She may be rather mad with energy at times but I like her. We must have talked for maybe twenty minutes or more yesterday and she was almost late for a meeting, haha. She is the kind of person that does care about her students and always puts on the enthusiastic face when she comes in no matter what. She had the slightest lowering of energy on Monday and we all noticed. It gave us the feeling that she was human too, that she could be cansada even with all her overflowing energy.
Mmm. Oh yeah, Soc prof, I know I bubble about him. But it's good to have him. He's involved and is looking for answers with us and is willing to listen and believe in us. He and my profesora make me more comfortable. They're the kind of people I would want to be like if I taught. And my education professor last semester or my enviro professor from fall of freshman year.

~~~~A moment to smile~~~~
There are those small moments that you stray across
So sudden and unexpected
So sweet in the arrival
So small in the gesture
That make you smile.
For though it was unintentional in all rights
It is like a glowing ember gem in your day
For your heart embraced in the gift in the biggest of ways
In the simple thing
of grabbing you a tray.

Yes, all it was was my Morning Boy grabbing me a tray but the gesture was so unexpected that I dunno....it just made my heart glow. I fed off that feeling the rest of the day so far. I think it was a source of energy, that ember of happiness that lights the fire that becomes the sunlight of your day.
I just needed to note it because how often do you get such a true smile on your face?

~~~~~~~~~~~

And with that I must be off to dinner.
Farewell looooovars.

Oh and the answer to the pictures question: Buttermilk Falls.

Peace.
~Lo

La musica



P.S.
Another morning moment. They were talking about calculus and infinities.
"Talk to Professor Smith about infinity and he'll go on forever."
I didn't realize I'm made a joke until one of the guys started laughing at my horribly unintentional pun. Hahaha.