Today has been an interesting day for me.
I've been racked a range of emotion and one of them I haven't experienced for nearly six years. It is that of grevious injury felt to you because of the damage that has been done upon another with whom you are close.

I can't detail it in public because it hurts too much. Inwardly it's almost like the worst thing I have heard this year because it's not to me that the pain was caused but to a close friend. It's almost worse because some friends are deeper than blood and having something happen to them is worse than it happening to your own being...because you couldn't be there to stop it and because it's happened to so many people before at the same time.
It's the kind of thing you whisper to few and feel deeply within you. To talk about it- to try and achieve justice for the wrong done -is to make a private pain and personal event public.
But what weighs greater? The need for justice or the ability and need to heal?
There are so many conflictions.

My heart is heavy.

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So I have made a resolution that after August 18th I am cutting my ties to this internet social life I have had. It's time and it keeps me from experience the life around me. There is no point in being shuttered away when I could be out there living. I am beginning to pull away more and I am using it less as well now that I use meebo.com. Not having an IM service on your desktop makes it less tempting to use. I am also favoring real human interaction and am reflecting on how much of life I am not experience due to be sucked in to one where "experiences" are only superfical.
Mainly I am talking about IMVU. I have had fun on it and mind you my avatar is really cool but I am done with it. I need to stop cloistering myself or if I am going to cloister myself I could at least do so as I used to by reading a book or something. It's time to start really living.
I am trying to live my life less through the screen (and facebook statuses for that matter).

So here it comes and wish me luck.

~~~~~

Postive things:
I went out for dinner and a movie with my friend Amanda and it was mucho fun. She's like the friend that reminds me of how hot guys are and why I should drool over them even though she's quiet. She reminds me that I'm like...straight and I have no problem rating guys or lamenting a lack of hotness in the general area. I feel slightly more adventurous and more go with the flow that usual.
We had Thai food for dinner. That stuff is GOOD! Thai tea is kind of uber creamy sweet but pad thai is amazing. With a bit of spice and lime juice it's up there with the best stuff I have ever eaten next to:
Uber Amazing Fried Chicken and Mashed Potatoes of Godliness from the Night of My Birthday
The Best Farking Lebanese Lentil Soup Ever
Rick's Homemade Baklava of MmmmmhmmmmmMmmmm More Please
Hot Italian Bread of Greatness from when I was Little
Chai Vanilla Milkshake of Slurping the Foam Afterward Greatness
Nom Nom Nom Om Supa Good Cooked Asparagus from Baltimore
Mom's Meatload: Enough Said
Nanny's Stuffing: Again Enough Said
Grandma Joan's Baked Meatballs: Enough Said Again

After the food we went and watched The Proposal in which Ryan Reynolds was amazingly yummy and hilarious at the same time. I was laughing my face off quite a bit. All time favorite part is his expression evolution when Sandra Bullock's character tells her bosses that she's getting married. Well that and when he jumps in bed in Alaska and she's all "Ew!! Oh my god!" and he's like "It's the morning okay!". Sexual humor is some of my favorite, so kill me. I'm over 18. Whateva.
It was fun.

I saw my friend from college today which kept me mostly sane as we walked around town, talked about school, family, friends, stopped back at my house and then went out to dinner. It was nice seeing her and talking. Mom got a picture and is going to try and hook her up with my brother Chris. I think Mom will be happy the day that all of us are happily taken with partners she approves of. Then whoknows she might even stop moving furnature because the planets will be aligned and she might get another grand child. Wait...I just said she might stop moving furnature. No no no. That definitely means something is really fucked up. Scratch that!
Anyhoo I stayed pretty okay until after my friend left and then I just kind of...yeah.

Ooh and last week I was able to see home-people. Again we went for coffee and dinner and goofiness and hung out until we all parted because we work and have to wake up early.

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I miss my girls at school. Four weeks and I am back. It will go by fast. This is a blessing and a blunder. I am enjoying summer and the last of it is escaping me all too fast. But I am ready to go back all the same. I miss them. I'm excited for traditions. I'm ready for academics. I am a junior (whaaaaa???).

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Chronic arthistis crap is really sucking the nads. I am not a fan.

However: Temujin(Genghis Khan) is the shiz.
Spain is the shiz.
History is the shiz.

I am up way past my bed time.
Crud.
Buenos noches.
Peace
~Lo

P.S.
I swear to Bob if I see one more thing about god damn mother farking farking mother M.J. in the news ONE MORE TIME I am going to doing a full force enraged chimpanzee monkey screech. And then people will not like me and think I am mental. I won't care because they should also understand that M.J.'s cadaver is not a worthy center of news attention.
There.