Whattup folks - long time no blog. I hope everyone had a quality, uneventful Thanksgiving. (If the words "eventful" and "Thanksgiving" are used in the same sentence, usually it's not good.)

Right now, I'm drinking a cocktail on the couch and enjoying a UCLA blowout at home against George Washington. ("The school is just six blocks from the White House!" the announcer informs.)

The highlight so far: Whenever an opponent fouls out, the UCLA student section chants "Left!, Right!" in sync with the guy's footsteps and then yells "Sittown!" as he takes a seat.

So when G.W.'s center fouled out with about 11 minutes to play, he tried to pretend like he didn't notice the chanting behind him but kept screwing with the crowd. He'd act like he was about to sit and then suddenly - but casually - run across the sideline, to the ire of the entire Pauley Pavilion. This lasted for about two minutes. High comedy!

Anyways. What else is new?

• Let's see ... apparently you hit 30 and your body falls apart. Like those cartoons where a car spontaneously collapses into pieces. First, I destroyed my back playing touch football. (Well, that's not fair - it really dates back to college rowing.) But it's led to some fun AM physical therapy before work.
  
  
• Then last week my eye decided to get infected - I woke up last Tuesday and it had swelled so large that it wouldn't open. Nameless was visiting last week and needless to say she found it very endearing. It's almost completely cleared up but was quite the pain in the ass last week. I interviewed Bruce Jenner on Friday and you could tell he was trying not to look at it. "What the fuck is wrong with this guy's eye?"
  
  
• And you can only say "You should see the other guy!" so many times before you want to shoot out the other eye.
  
  
• One of the most memorable college football seasons ever is wrapping up. I'll miss calling my mom every weekend and making sure she heard that Notre Dame lost. Particularly when they lost for the first time to Navy since Roger Staubach was a college quarterback. That was pretty fun.
  
  
• Saw Dewey and Crittle for the first time since that scandalous 2005 summer in DC, on their way to Monterrey. I also met Baby Dewey, who's very cute. I'm not just saying that in the obligatory "I have to say so-and-so is cute" way, because she really is. And she's at that great five-month age: Those babies have more features and personality than some newborn squinty shrub of skin, but they can't walk yet or legitimately terrorize their parents either. Not that I know what I'm talking about ... I wish all the best for my illegitimate offspring out there, wherever they are!
  
  
• Ladies and gentlemen, your new Dodger manager: Joe Torre! I say we go after Johan Santana next. Not only cause he's the best pitcher in baseball, but also because he's Venezuelan and two years later people still identify me as that Venezuela-guy. ?Por que' no te callas?
  
  
• Jesus, when're the presidential primaries already? Next week? How many more friggin debates until then? 27? I really hope the only reason things got off to such an early start this time is because Bush is such a craptacular president. If this is how the process goes from now on, I'll be pissed.
  
  
• Egg nog is good. Also, they're opening a Del Taco down the street. I will not be skinny.
  
  
• My favorite new show, as we all anxiously await the fifth and final season of the Wire to debut in January: the "re-imagined" Battlestar Galactica. I would like to say I'm not a geek. I would like to say that. But it's for the ripped-from-the-headlines plots, not the low budget effects and questionable acting - I swear!
  
  
• Look, it's really simple: I don't like Hillary. But I'll vote for her. I like Obama. And I'll vote for him. Wake me up when it's November 2008.
  
  
• About the whole terrible Baby Grace thing: When that was first reported way-back-when, I remember thinking "Gah! What an awful forensic sketch!" Even Nameless this weekend was like, "They made her look like a neanderthal." Judge for yourself:
  
  
  
  So of course what does CNN do when the girl is identified? They profile the sketch artist, explaining what an amazing a job she did, apparently. I guess so. At this point, I should just tell CNN what I think sucks and that can be their front-page news.
  
  
• You're gonna be stunned, but I haven't been on the front page in more than a month. Likely tomorrow, though. But it's sort of like being single and going through a bad dry spell - the longer the famine lasts, the more desperate you come across and the less likely you are to seal the deal. I think I'll call this "The Nery Principle."
  
  
• So Nameless gets back in town and of course that's Bravo's cue to run another Project Runway marathon - this time till 1.am.! Someone at that network knows me and is trying to inflict serious torture. But how's this for quick thinking: I scanned the episode info on the TV cable guide, then found them on iTunes and downloaded to my iPod. Then Nameless gets to watch the latest Project Runway twist, where some gay guy designs a dress (gasp!) and I get to play Halo 3. Yay!
  
  
• Time to wrap this up. I get to wake up and do 10-lbs ab-crunches like I'm 82 years old. It's all downhill from here, folks. In some Asian societies I would be exiled already for being old and useless. Blegh!