Anne,

Sometimes the depth of my stupidity amazes me. Although I am sure it doesnt faze you. For twenty years now I have been writing to you, and once again I thought I needed a change. And once again I realize I dont. Eventually I will realize that you are the only friend I need for this. It is just that sometimes I want someone I can talk to. I am so much better at expressing myself that way. Sometimes I want someone who can hold me when I cry. But truth be told there is no one better than you. Who else will sit there and just let me talk? Poor out the venom and spite that eats at my soul? Ah well. I get so frustrated of writing the same things over and over. For it is the same things come to trouble me. I often wonder if you are silently screaming for me to shut up and find a different topic to discuss. But I guess a captive audience is better than none at all. Josh moved home. We have went out a few times and it is just like it used to be. I missed him so much. Even if I dont want to go out he always makes have fun when I get there. He will do or say anything to make me laugh. That year without him was awful. More later I am running late for a doctors appointment.