To answer TTs question, the first appointment is Thursday afternoon. B gave me a little trouble saying that I had a chance to give her background before he did. All I told him, was that I told her that I didn't want to give up on a 33 year marriage. I did not tell him the rest that I told her! (I may be dumb, but not stupid!)

Anyway, My headaches have been non-stop. I did manage to go to special conference on Sunday and I am glad I did. My heart needed to hear the messages, for my sake.

TT, thank you for pointing out that B has to love me more than he loves himself. He thinks he does, but I have noticed that even when he says he is taking care of me-it always refers back to how he is feeling. I can allow myself to 'love him'. And allow myself to feel again, without that hurt that he is not able to do the same.

It is funny, he said that he read an article on codependency. That the article said that the only way to stop condependent behavior was to separate. In other words, divorce. I looked at him and told him that I have read more than one article and from more than one source. That there are ways to modify behavior, to retrain codependent behavior if BOTH parties are willing to work on it. But if he isn't willing to work on it, then it isn't going to work. He didn't like my response. I knew more than he did, and I acknowledge that I have codependent behviors that I have been stopping. And that is the catch. (I don't think that the marriage counseling is going to work-B thinks that the fact that I can tell him that I love him means that we are OK. He's finding out-nope, not happening.) Hey folks, this old grey mare has learned!! Hey TT, did you think it was EVER going to happen?

My migraines have been non-stop. Sometimes are harder than others. Today I am at work, covering for other secretary-but missed work again yesterday. Even though they were working on plumbing and pipes in the apartment building. Yesterday I took enough med to knock me out on the couch while workers cut and banged to their hearts content in my closet. Still headachey today, but am here.

On the side note, I am knitting a stuffed bunny from a yarn wrapper. It is cute. When it is done, I am going to modify the directions, by embroidering a face to it. This will be put aside to be given to the apartment building yearly collection at Christmas. I want to do Teddy Bears next. It is fun making toys!!