Here is something I don't understand. People can talk shit about me, they can make fun of me to my face, they can be nasty, but when the same thing happens to them, they get all bent out of shape. This is directed at anyone who reads this and probably thinks I'm a whiny emotional whore for having an online diary. I don't really give a fuck. If you don't think enough of me to talk to me in person, then why come on here and read what I have to say? And if you hate me and tell me to kill myself on a daily basis and constantly irritate me, then why does it surprise you that I think you're a fucking asshole? It's all really logical. In ceramics the other day Chris was telling me how shitty it was to put someone's name on the internet. It's not shitty. It's logical. People are allowed to say whatever they want but god forbid their name is on a website that no one reads and it's the biggest deal in the world. If you don't like when people talk poorly of you, then maybe you should think a little harder before you go out and make fun of people. Most of the things I write on here and stupid and petty, and the people who find themselves on here are people that damn well deserve it. You don't care how I felt when you sat there and made fun of me, but suddenly you care when I'm calling an ignorant asshole online. Why is that? Is my opinion of you so important, important enough to have a shit fit over? I hope not. Everyone has their releases. Some like to go out and get drunk and smoke weed. Others like to play sports or exercise. I like writing, I have always liked writing, and if that makes me a psycho then oh well. It's just very funny how hurt people get when they find out their shit doesn't stink. I won't mention this kid's name again because he already had a heart attack when I did the first time. But what did you think I thought of you? Did you think I thought you were a cool, understanding, enjoyable person to be around? Did you think I liked you? Jesus Christ, how fucking stupid can you be? For an entire year you told me to kill myself, every single day. So obviously I mean nothing to you, but all of a sudden when I write how much of a dipshit you are you get all upset. Oh poor baby. Maybe your name wouldn't be there if you weren't such an assclown. I believe people get what they give, and if you can't take it then you shouldn't give it.

I am done with trying to convince people that I am not insane. Because I probably am. But oh well, I'm going to college and it's going to kick ass and I am going to be hundreds of miles away from here and never deal with this shit again. I really, really really can't wait. I can't wait to be in South Carolina where it barely ever snows in a huge school with a lot of people and a kick ass dorm because I made the honors college so now I get a good dorm. I have no shame anymore and I will not be modest. I worked hard and slaved away in Dairy Queen while everyone else went out and partied and now I'm going to college and it's gonna kick ass.

This weekend was also the drama competition. Last year was more fun. I miss the guys I went with last year. This year my heart is not in it. I thought acting was the coolest thing ever and then I got my license and now I have too much stuff to do. It was like a phase I grew out of. Whatever. I have 3 more months and it's over.