design with a side of dialogue
what I think about what I make
104886 Curiosities served
crossroads passed
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Context: uss
Sounds/Songs: Theme from Saving Private Ryan
Book: Jaka's Story
Film: Quills
What I need right now is...a door.
So, I've officially told aip that I will not be coming back for the graphic design ba. I'm actually feeling pretty good about it. The conversation went very well with my advisor, and she actually had a few good suggestions. (like workshops, or possibly a 2nd associates in multi-media) She also said that I have a good rep around the school, which makes me blush. No faster way to my heart then flattery. I hate to admit that. Well, considering that I'm questioning my authenticity at the moment -- its a bit affirming. It's not so much that I want to drop graphic arts completely, but I don't feel like duking it out in the trenches of some design firm for minimum pay. It seems petty.
So. Here I am. Or rather, I am here again.
What happens next?
....
[later]
I feel like an accident victim about my time at aip. Not that it was that tramatic, but I feel as if I have a faint memory that at one time I was a graphic designer, that they had a school and everything. Very much the dave sims approach to history. {weren't you the pope once?} So I don't know. Seems I've been busy distancing myself from the experience in a vain attempt to get perspective. Welcome to the push - pull method of coping.
Another point that I have not had a change to add here - so I've been listening to a recording made of my last concert. And it hit me the other day that this is really me thats me. me playing. me. foolishness but it was like hearing my recorded voice for the first time - or rather the first time that I didn't mind hearing myself. Its not so much that I'm a great musician or that I do it for artistic integrity, etc. but its a sound that I find familiar. that i can hear in my mind as my voice. it is similiar to the timor of my internal monologue. it is the closest thing I have for words.
Sounds/Songs: Theme from Saving Private Ryan
Book: Jaka's Story
Film: Quills
What I need right now is...a door.
So, I've officially told aip that I will not be coming back for the graphic design ba. I'm actually feeling pretty good about it. The conversation went very well with my advisor, and she actually had a few good suggestions. (like workshops, or possibly a 2nd associates in multi-media) She also said that I have a good rep around the school, which makes me blush. No faster way to my heart then flattery. I hate to admit that. Well, considering that I'm questioning my authenticity at the moment -- its a bit affirming. It's not so much that I want to drop graphic arts completely, but I don't feel like duking it out in the trenches of some design firm for minimum pay. It seems petty.
So. Here I am. Or rather, I am here again.
What happens next?
....
[later]
I feel like an accident victim about my time at aip. Not that it was that tramatic, but I feel as if I have a faint memory that at one time I was a graphic designer, that they had a school and everything. Very much the dave sims approach to history. {weren't you the pope once?} So I don't know. Seems I've been busy distancing myself from the experience in a vain attempt to get perspective. Welcome to the push - pull method of coping.
Another point that I have not had a change to add here - so I've been listening to a recording made of my last concert. And it hit me the other day that this is really me thats me. me playing. me. foolishness but it was like hearing my recorded voice for the first time - or rather the first time that I didn't mind hearing myself. Its not so much that I'm a great musician or that I do it for artistic integrity, etc. but its a sound that I find familiar. that i can hear in my mind as my voice. it is similiar to the timor of my internal monologue. it is the closest thing I have for words.
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